How to Tell When She Wants to Hold Your Hand

Holding hands is a great way to let a girl know that you like her and are having a good time. You may be a little nervous the first time you hold her hand, especially if you’re not sure if she wants to hold your hand. We’ve listed here the signs that the girl you like wants to hold hands so you know what to do the next time you two hang out.

Table of Contents

She places her hand near yours.

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Maybe the two of you are sitting and talking and she places her hand near yours. If her hand is almost touching yours (but hasn’t touched his), that’s a good sign that she wants you to hold her hand. You can probe first by gently touching her hand – if she doesn’t pull her hand away, she probably wants you to hold it. ^{[1] X Research Source}

She may also put her hand next to yours when you’re sitting at a table or on a bench.

She let her hand graze yours.

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If you feel her hand graze yours, she probably wants you to hold it. Suppose you are walking next to each other and she moves closer to you to gently touch your hand, then reach out and take her hand and see what she means. If she really wants to hold your hand, she’ll be glad you took the initiative to go first. ^{[2] X Research Source}

If you’re not sure, gently touch her hand with your hand. If she doesn’t pull her hand away, she probably wants to hold your hand.

She touches your arm or shoulder.

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Breaking the touch barrier is a good sign. If the two of you are talking and she often pats you on the shoulder or touches your arm, then she doesn’t mind physical contact. Next time, you can try holding her hand or patting her arm in response to her touch. ^{[3] X Research Sources}

Breaking the touch barrier is also a clear sign that she’s flirting, and of course that’s good news!

She clung to your arm.

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A girl can cling to your arm when you’re walking side by side. This gesture was already very close to holding hands, so she probably didn’t mind going a little further. If you like holding her hand, just pull her hand into yours and hold it while you’re walking. ^{[4] X Research Sources}

Here’s another way to break the touch barrier, but a little bolder.

She doesn’t mind when you graze her hand.

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She doesn’t pull back when your hand touches hers, even if it’s just by accident. If two people are walking together and by chance their hands are touching, she may step even closer. Or, if the two of you are sitting around talking and you accidentally put your hand on hers, she may smile or even blush. ^{[5] X Research Sources}

If she immediately pulls her hand away when you touch her, she may not be ready for you to hold hands. It’s okay, you just give her more time.

She let her hand linger for a moment as the two of you high five.

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She can probe if you want to hold hands. When you’re celebrating something and high five, she may keep her hand on yours for a few seconds longer than usual. That way you’ll know she wants to hold your hand at some point. ^{[6] X Research Sources}

If she’s bolder, she might not even pull her hand back after high five so that you both hold hands.

She takes you by the hand and leads you somewhere.

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This is an indirect way for her to hold your hand. If a girl pulls your hand to see something, she probably wants to hold your hand. When you get to a certain point, hold her hand to let her know that you like her. ^{[7] X Research Sources}

She might say something like “Oh my god, have you seen this? Let me show you!” before pulling your hand.

She flirts with you.

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Flirting is a good sign that she’ll be willing to hold your hand. When a girl is “quiet”, she will compliment you, laugh a little too much when you joke or often make eye contact. Perhaps she also leans in closer to you or steps closer to you than is normally socially distanced. ^{[8] X Research Sources}

Flirting isn’t a surefire sign of whether a person wants to hold hands or not, but it’s certainly a step in the right direction.

She smiles at you.

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She can make eye contact with you and look you in the eye for a long time. When a girl smiles at you, it means she’s happy to hang out with you. While it’s not a surefire sign that she wants to hold your hand, it’s still a sign that she likes you or has feelings for you. ^{[9] X Research Source}

She might even make eye contact with you from across the room or glance at you and smile.

She spoke in a voice like singing.

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A squeaky voice is often a sign that someone likes you. A woman who likes someone will say it in a low voice, even if she doesn’t realize she’s doing it. If you notice that she sounds like a singer when she’s talking, she’s probably ready to hold your hand. ^{[10] X Research Source}

On the contrary, when men like someone, they will speak in a low voice.

She mimics your body language.

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If you lean in, she’ll lean in too. If you cross your legs, she will cross her legs just like you. People often do this unconsciously when they like someone, because our brain tells us that doing so will make the other person like us more. If you notice her repeating your every move, chances are she wants to hold your hand. ^{[11] X Research Source}

She may also imitate your posture or try to walk in the same rhythm as you.

Advice

If you’re not sure if she wants to hold your hand, you can simply ask, “Can I hold your hand?”

Steps