How to Talk to a Girlfriend on the Phone

Quality conversations are key to your relationship success. ^{[1] X Research Sources} Even in today’s era of texting and social media, 87% of teenagers still talk to their lovers on the phone. ^{[2] X Trusted Source Pew Research Center Go to Source} The fact that you put a lot of effort into talking on the phone will show her that you really like her and make her feel loved . Whether she’s a girlfriend you’ve known for a long time or a pretty girl you just met, you can apply the tips below to make her ecstatic.

Table of Contents

Choose the right time and place to call

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Based on your girlfriend’s schedule. Schedule a time to chat via text, or wait until you think she’s free to call. Don’t inconvenience or make her choose between you and friends or family. You can call after rehearsal at the club, after the gym, the end of your shift at the coffee shop, or after dinner at home.

Text her a few hours before you want to call: Are you free tonight, can we talk? or can you call me at 7 o’clock tonight? You need the flexibility to calculate a time that is convenient for both parties.
If she is busy:
Don’t: get upset or angry.
So: say so tomorrow night okay? or Good luck on the test! Can we talk at the weekend?

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Call in a quiet and private place. Girls will be more open and honest with you if she knows that no one can hear your conversation. Don’t call her when you’re hanging out with other people, and don’t turn on speakerphone without asking her first. ^{[3] X Research Sources}

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Concentrate completely on her. Your girlfriend is giving you the gift of her time, and you should too. Most young people find that the conversation is ruined when they do many things at the same time. ^{[4] X Research Source} Tell her you consider talking to her the most important thing in the world. Don’t text, chat online, watch TV, or talk to other people while on the phone with your girlfriend.

Chat

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Hi, she’s very nice. Emotions are very contagious. ^{[5] X Research Source} If your voice sounds friendly and enthusiastic, she’ll respond the same way. When she picks up the phone, say hello to start the conversation and show that you want to hear her talk. Use appropriate words depending on the level of intimacy between the two of you:

Greet! What is my little girl doing?
Hello beautiful lady! How are you today?
I waited all day to hear your voice! What am I doing today?

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Leave a sweet voice message. If she doesn’t pick up and the call goes to voicemail, leave a short and lovely message. She’ll be touched that you’ve thought of her and enjoy hearing your voice.

If the two of you have been dating for a while, you can say: I just called to say I love you!
If your relationship is just getting started, leave a more casual message: I just want to know if you’re happy. I miss you!
Let her know the best time to call you back so you don’t have to play catch when she calls and only get a text: I’ll be home at 7 o’clock after soccer practice. See you later?

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Start with a chat. Humans are social animals and by nature like to talk to each other. ^{[6] X Research Sources} Chatting creates a sense of connection as people begin to get to know each other. Even the most miscellaneous stories are filled with meaning in a new relationship. You can stick to topics that make her comfortable like:

Share your story of the day.
Ask about her favorite sports team.
Tell about an event that took place at school.
Discuss a TV show or movie you both watched.
If the conversation turns bland:
Don’t: interrupt or abruptly end the conversation.
Do: ask questions that lead to an interesting topic.

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Praise her. Let the girl know you enjoy her conversation and presence. Speak encouraging words to her to open up, but don’t go overboard:

My story is great!
Happy!
I’m curious to hear what happens!
I’m a really easy person to talk to.
Don’t: repeat generic compliments all the time.
Do: say I love hearing your voice get excited when we talk about __.

Keep up the conversation

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Let the conversation develop naturally. If the two of you are on the same page, the casual conversation will deepen. You can move from funny stories to private topics. Take advantage of these opportunities to help the two of you get to know each other better:

I’m also learning to play this guitar! Why did you choose the guitar over another instrument?
You get your driver’s license in three months? When you have a car, where do you plan to go?
Two more weeks until vacation! Where do you plan to go on holiday?

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Expression of affection. She will be frank and open when you act the same way. Most people don’t show their true feelings out of fear of rejection, not because they don’t care. ^{[7] X Research Source} If you tell her how much she means to you, she’ll be sure to tell you the same.

Every time I see you, I feel like the whole world lights up.
I am the most beautiful girl in the city.
It is true that no one understands me better than you.

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Ask open-ended questions. Choose questions that make your girlfriend feel comfortable telling stories, prompting past stories and expressing feelings. Don’t ask questions to which she will usually respond with “yes” or “no”.

Don’t: start with leading phrases like I guess you… or You must be…
Do: use suggestive question words like How… , Why… , and What… ^{[8] X Trusted Source Harvard Business Review Go to source}

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Know how to listen. Talking is two-way, and listening is just as important as talking. Don’t interrupt or overwhelm your girlfriend. Pay attention to what she says, wait for her to finish, and then ask questions. Encourage her to share more.

Then what?
So how do I feel?
Why do you like milk tea at shop X the most?

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Avoid topics that make conversations awkward. You need to be honest with your girlfriend, but don’t attack her or make her uncomfortable. Assess her enthusiasm during the conversation. If she seems interested in the topic at hand, go further. If she’s quiet or seems confused and says I don’t know , Maybe or I guess many times, move the conversation to another more interesting area.

Be aware of sensitive topics as you get to know the girl more and avoid them. You need to make conversations a positive experience. Reliving sad events (parents divorce, ex-boyfriend, death of a dear grandmother) is not a shortcut to bonding. Let her know that she can tell you anything, but don’t intentionally stir up unpleasant emotions.
The fact that you show your affection too quickly can scare her. Don’t appear too longing or lacking in affection. Don’t make insensitive comments about her appearance that she might not like.
Don’t: be afraid to express your feelings and share life experiences.
Do: pay attention to her comfort level and adjust in later conversations.

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Plan for the future. Planning together, whether it’s just a date night or a lifetime plan, strengthens the bond between the couple. Talk about where the two of you will live and go if possible, the breed of dog you want to adopt, or the house of your dreams. Have fun and let your imagination soar. Keep the conversation light and friendly: you don’t have to make plans for your life together. Tell your girlfriend how much you want to go on adventures with her.

Don’t: start talking about getting married or moving in together before you’ve met to talk about it.
Do: talk about the future in a light, fun way.

Good bye

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End the conversation before it loses its excitement. It’s better to say goodbye when you both still have something to say, and you’ll both look forward to the next conversation. Suggest topics you can talk about on the phone next time.

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Say you’re happy to talk to her. Let your girlfriend know that she is special and that you enjoy her story. She’ll be more likely to call you if she knows that you’re looking forward to hearing her voice.

I look forward to talking with you soon! Call me anytime.
All night I will remember your sweet voice forever.
Don’t forget to call me.
I’ll text you tomorrow morning!

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Make her smile when you say goodbye. Say something sweet right before hanging up that you know will make her happy. Tell your own jokes, tease her with a nickname she likes, or praise her to make her cheeks flush.

Goodbye beautiful girl.
Good night my sun!
Chop chuck! Good night!

Advice

Don’t try too hard to impress her. You probably don’t want to seem arrogant or insecure.
Don’t talk about other girls to make her jealous. She will know.
Speak in a confident, calm, and graceful voice throughout the conversation.
Make sure you have plenty of time to talk before you call. You don’t want to miss an important moment in the conversation or mislead her into thinking you’re hanging up.
Make sure the conversation doesn’t get boring. You are talking to your girlfriend, not your grandmother.
Don’t lose patience or cause arguments on the phone. She will run away.
Respect her family and culture.
Think about what you’re going to say before you call her.

Steps

Choose the right time and place to call

Chat

Keep up the conversation

Good bye

Advice

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