How to Interact with People with Disabilities

Above all, you need to show respect. People with disabilities should be respected like everyone else. We should see them as normal people, not disabled people. If you have to “name” their disability, ask them directly what word they use and use it. ^[1] Usually, you should follow the “golden rule”: treat others the way you would like them to treat you. ^[2]

• Most people with disabilities prefer to put “personality” first, ^[3] is to put their name or identity before their disability. For example, you should say something like “his sister, who has sciatica” instead of “his sister has a knife”.
• A few more examples of putting the person first: “A has cerebral palsy”, “T doesn’t look very well” or “B uses a wheelchair”, instead of saying someone is “physically disabled/disabled”. /spirit” (these terms are condescending) you can say “the blind girl” or “the girl in the wheelchair”. You should avoid using colloquial phrases if possible. Although some people are uncomfortable with the word “disability”, many others use this word to describe themselves because they feel they do not exist if they consider it a “bad word”, and the Disability is also a part of who they are. If they consider themselves “disabled,” ask them if they feel comfortable being called that or why they describe themselves that way. This helps you get their point of view.
• You need to pay attention to how to call between many people or groups of people. In particular, many deaf, blind and autistic people don’t like to put their personal names first, they want to put “identification first” (for example, “A is autistic”). ^[4] Another example, for people with hearing loss, we often use the phrase hearing impairment or hearing impairment to describe their disability, however the phrase The word Deaf (capitalize the first letter) refers to a community or a person in that community. ^[5] If in doubt, just politely ask the person how to address them.

Never raise your voice to a person with a disability. No matter what the possibilities are, no one wants to be treated like a child or an underdog. When talking to people with disabilities, do not use childish vocabulary, pet names, or speak louder than usual. Don’t use “superior” gestures like patting their back or patting their head. ^[6] These behaviors imply that you do not think people with disabilities are capable of understanding, and that you equate them with children. Speak with normal volume and vocabulary, and talk to them like you would with a normal person.

• You may speak slowly for people with hearing loss or cognitive disabilities. Similarly, you can speak louder than usual to the deaf so they can hear what you say. Usually they will remind you if you speak too softly. ^[7] You can ask them if you speak too fast, need to slow down or speak more clearly.
• Don’t think you have to simplify your vocabulary when you talk. You should use simple language only if you are talking to someone with an intellectual disability or communication difficulty. Interrupting the other person is not considered polite and is not the same as talking to someone who can’t keep up with what you have to say. However, if you are in doubt, have a normal conversation and see what their language needs are.

Do not use nicknames or offensive phrases arbitrarily. Derogatory nicknames or names are inappropriate and should be avoided in conversations with people with disabilities. Identifying someone with a disability or derogatory nickname (such as “crippled” or “disabled”) is both hurtful and disrespectful. Always be careful in your words, censor your words if necessary. Avoid saying words like dumb, retarded, lame, spastic, dwarf, etc. ^[8] careful not to identify someone with a disability instead their name or role.

• When referring a person with a disability, you do not necessarily have to refer to their disability. You just need to say “this is my colleague, Ms. A” without saying “this is my colleague, Ms. A, she is deaf.”
• If you use a common phrase like “I have to run!” For people in wheelchairs, don’t apologize. Phrases like this don’t hurt them, but saying sorry means focusing your attention on their disability. ^[9]

Talk to them directly, not through an aide or an interpreter. People with disabilities will feel frustrated when talking to people who do not speak to them directly, but have to go through an assistant or an interpreter. Similarly, you should speak directly to the person in a wheelchair, not to the person standing next to them. Their bodies are disabled but their brains are not! ^[10] If you are talking to a person with hearing loss assisted by a nurse or with a sign language interpreter, you should still speak to the person directly.

• Even if the person doesn’t have body language that indicates they’re listening (for example, the autistic person isn’t looking directly at you), don’t jump to the conclusion that they didn’t hear you. Just keep talking to them.

Be patient and ask questions if necessary. Speeding up a conversation or interrupting people with disabilities can be engaging, but disrespectful. ^[11] Always let them talk and act at their own pace, don’t push them to talk, think or move faster. Also, if you don’t understand because they speak too slowly or too fast, don’t be afraid to ask again. Acting like you understand what they’re saying can be harmful or embarrassing if you mishear, so double-check. ^[12]

• A person with dysarthria can make it difficult for others to understand when talking. You should not urge them to speak faster and should ask them to speak again if necessary.
• Many people take a long time to process conversations or put thoughts into words (regardless of intellectual ability). So it is normal for a conversation to have a long pause.

Don’t be afraid to ask about someone’s disability. Being curious about someone else’s disability is not a good idea, but if you feel you can make it easier for them to deal with the situation (for example, ask the person if they would like to take the elevator with you instead of climbing the bridge). ladder when you see them having difficulty walking), you can completely ask them. ^[13] It is possible that they have been asked this question many times and know how to briefly explain it. If the disability is a consequence of the accident or the information is too personal, they may refuse to respond.

• It is insulting to show understanding of another’s disability; you better ask instead of deducing yourself. ^[14]

Understand that some defects are not visible. If you see someone seemingly healthy parking in a handicapped spot, don’t confront them and accuse them of not being disabled, as you may not recognize their disability. Sometimes there are “invisible defects” that are not immediately visible but are still defects. ^[15]

• Form good habits such as being kind and considerate to people, you cannot understand their situation just by appearance.
• Some disabilities change from day to day: many people yesterday still needed a wheelchair but today only need crutches. This doesn’t mean they’re pretending or “getting better,” just that they have good days and bad days just like everyone else.