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This article was co-written by Trudi Griffin, LPC, MS. Trudi Griffin is a licensed professional counselor in Wisconsin. She received her MS in Clinical Mental Health Counseling from Marquette University in 2011.
There are 17 references cited in this article that you can view at the bottom of the page.
This article has been viewed 9,441 times.
Surely you will be surprised to know the fact that all of us have negative thoughts, they are part of human evolution. We are programmed to scan our surroundings, look for problems that need fixing, and expend a lot of mental energy considering the worst-case scenario. Negative thoughts are only disturbing when we begin to believe them. [1] X Research Source Fortunately, by combining a variety of strategies, you can quell negative thinking and learn to think more optimistically.
Steps
Identifying and Challenging Negative Thinking
- All-or-nothing thinking : Extreme “all-or-nothing” thinking. You always see things as good or bad, wrong or right, with no complexity or mediocrity. [3] X Research Sources
- Over-generalizing : Turning a negative experience into an immutable “rule”. These thoughts often take the form of “You always…”, “I never…”, or “Everybody…” [4] X Research Source
- Psychological screening : Screen all the positive elements of the situation and leave only the negative ones. For example, when you have a great date, but you only focus on the shyness of silence at the beginning of the date. [5] X Research Sources
- Rushing to conclusions : Drawing negative conclusions for yourself and not giving relevant evidence, such as concluding that you know what other people think or what will happen in the future. [6] X Research Sources
- Take the problem seriously : Always think the worst case and “inflate” small problems. [7] X Research Sources
- Emotional Reasoning : Believing that one’s current emotions reflect actual objects. When you feel pitiful, the current situation will get worse. [8] X Research Sources
- “Should” and “shouldn’t” : Saying that you should or shouldn’t do something and think that others prefer or dislike doing it. [9] X Research Source
- Labeling : Labeling yourself or others based solely on a behavior despite ample evidence against it. [10] X Research Source
- Personalization : Take full responsibility for yourself in cases beyond your control. For example, if you are preparing a party and it suddenly starts to rain even though the forecast says it will be sunny, you blame yourself for the bad weather. [11] X Research Source
- Amplify and minimize : You undervalue the positives of yourself while exalting others. When someone praises you, you refuse. [12] X Research Source
- Record the triggering event, thought, or situation. [14] X Research Source Example: “I raised my voice to my lover before going to work this morning.”
- Record negative thoughts or beliefs during and after the incident. Ask yourself: “What was I thinking?”. “What do I say to myself?” and “What thought popped into my head at that moment?”. [15] X Research Source Example: “I ruined it. It’s the end of a relationship. He’s tired of pleasing me and doesn’t love me anymore, he’s going to break up with me.”
- Write words that describe how you feel and underline the word that best describes the event. [16] X Research Source Example: “fear, loneliness, hurt” and underline the word “fear”.
- Check the page you just wrote to see if you can identify your unhelpful thinking patterns. [17] X Research Source Example: “serious problem, jumping to conclusions, thinking in black and white.”
- Continuing with the example out loud to the lover, in the column “Evidence in support” you could write: “His face was angry and red and ran out of the house. He didn’t call me at lunch like usual. day.”
- In the “Evidence against” column you can write: “We’ve argued many times, even worse this time, but still made up. He said he needed time to cool down, once he calmed down. come back he will be more rational and willing to compromise.Last week he said he was busy all day today so he couldn’t call me at lunch he promised our marriage would be happy no matter what whatever happens. Arguing is unusual for us” etc
- This process helps you to observe your thoughts objectively. You analyze, evaluate, and evaluate your thoughts for authenticity instead of accepting them without question. [19] X Research Source
- How else can I assess this situation?
- If not, how would I view the situation?
- In fact, what is likely to happen?
- How do other people see the situation?
- Does thinking this way help?
- Some helpful words to tell yourself?
Learn Positive Thinking Skills
- Some other ways to express gratitude are to write a thank you letter, tell your partner you appreciate them, or silently thank someone else. [24] X Trusted Source Harvard Medical Schop Go to Source
- If you can’t make your own list, you can consult a friend or family member about the traits they like best about you.
- Keep the list in an easily accessible place, like in the drawer of your bedside table, the cupboard near the bedroom mirror, or in your journal. Read this list when you get caught up in negative thoughts.
- When you start to become aware of and intentionally interrupt negative thoughts, and then rearrange them in a positive way, it becomes easier for you to see things in a positive way. [26] X Research Source
- Remember that events don’t cause emotions, things first form thoughts, then thoughts affect emotions. [27] X Research Source If you train yourself to respond with positive thoughts, you will experience more positive or neutral emotions. [28] X Research Sources
Adopting a Long Term Coping Strategy
- Delay everyday worries by focusing them on the end of the “worrying period”. If a negative thought comes up, make a quick note of it and then postpone it to think about it later.
- Take a “worry period” to go through the list you just jotted down. If the thought is no longer relevant or disturbing, cross it off the list. You realize that many of your previous negative thoughts have waned and are no longer a concern, you don’t need to worry about them. [31] X Trusted Source HelpGuide Go to source
- If there’s still something bothering you, allow yourself to worry – but only for the set amount of time. [32] X Trusted Source HelpGuide Go to source
- When you find yourself paralyzed by things going off course, you need to be aware that you’re stuck and don’t know what’s going to happen. [35] X Research Source
- Feeling unresponsive (don’t “run after” anxiety). Instead, shift thinking about the future to thinking about the present. [36] X Research Source Use mindfulness meditation to bring yourself back to reality, focusing on your breath and paying attention to how each part of your body feels. [37] X Research Source
- Write down things you can do to start solving the problem, such as searching for a job online, calling a recruiter, asking a friend, seeing an ad in the newspaper. Then let’s get started!
- When negative thoughts arise, remind yourself that you have a plan of action and that you are following the solution.
Managing Stress, Anxiety and Fear
- The benefits of mindfulness meditation include reducing repetition (falling into negative thoughts), reducing stress, and improving cognitive flexibility, making it easier to break old thinking habits. [42] X Trusted Source American Psychpogical Association Go to Source
- Mindfulness meditation helps you reduce predicting the future and regretting the past, you will focus on the present moment to live life to the fullest. [43] X Trusted Source HelpGuide Go to source
- Progressive relaxation helps you reduce overall stress and tension, improves sleep, and relieves upset stomach and anxiety-related headaches. [45] X Research Sources
- When you start to feel tense, begin to close your eyes and relax your shoulders. [48] X Trusted Source American Institute of Stress Go to Source
- Imagine a black hole beneath your feet. Take a deep breath and imagine the hot air entering your body through the black hole, filling your lungs. Relax your calf, thigh, and abdominal muscles while imagining the flow of air. [49] X Trusted Source American Institute of Stress Go to Source
- Exhale and visualize in reverse, imagining the air flowing back out of your body and out through the black hole at your feet. [50] X Trusted Source American Institute of Stress Go to Source
This article was co-written by Trudi Griffin, LPC, MS. Trudi Griffin is a licensed professional counselor in Wisconsin. She received her MS in Clinical Mental Health Counseling from Marquette University in 2011.
There are 17 references cited in this article that you can view at the bottom of the page.
This article has been viewed 9,441 times.
Surely you will be surprised to know the fact that all of us have negative thoughts, they are part of human evolution. We are programmed to scan our surroundings, look for problems that need fixing, and expend a lot of mental energy considering the worst-case scenario. Negative thoughts are only disturbing when we begin to believe them. [1] X Research Source Fortunately, by combining a variety of strategies, you can quell negative thinking and learn to think more optimistically.
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