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This article was co-written by John Keegan. John Keegan is a New York-based marriage and love expert and motivational speaker. He runs The Awakened Lifestyle, where he uses his knowledge of marriage and love, attraction and social dynamics to help people find love. He teaches and gives seminars on marriage and love internationally, from Los Angeles to London and from Rio de Janeiro to Prague. His work has been featured in the New York Times, Humans of New York and Men’s Health.
There are 11 references cited in this article that you can view at the bottom of the page.
This article has been viewed 17,420 times.
Flirting with someone is both thrilling and exciting. Whether it’s a girl you already know or just met, flirting is easy when you know what to do. By approaching her with confidence, showing her personality, and getting to know her, you will have a chance to date the girl of your dreams!
Steps
Approach the beautiful girl
- While looks aren’t everything, it’s never too late to spend time taking care of your appearance!
- Remember that being confident doesn’t mean bragging or boasting about yourself. Confidence is demonstrated by your proactive approach and conversation with others.
- If you’re so nervous that you’re sweating or your hands are shaking during a conversation, ask permission to pause the conversation and go to the bathroom to calm down.
- Introducing yourself is the simplest way to bridge the gap and start a conversation, even if you’re shy.
- For example, to start a conversation with someone you met in class, you could say, “Hi, I’m Nam. You look very familiar, are you from Miss Nga’s English class?”
- For example, you could say, “Your hair is beautiful, and the color highlights your eyes.” Or, “I noticed you were wearing Nirvana’s shirt. It’s my favorite band!”
- If you’ve known her before, you can say, “Congratulations on getting a perfect score on your Chemistry test, it wasn’t easy!”
John Keegan
Marriage and Love Expert
John Keegan is a New York-based marriage and love expert and motivational speaker. He runs The Awakened Lifestyle, where he uses his knowledge of marriage and love, attraction and social dynamics to help people find love. He teaches and gives seminars on marriage and love internationally, from Los Angeles to London and from Rio de Janeiro to Prague. His work has been featured in the New York Times, Humans of New York and Men’s Health.
Marriage and Love Expert
Compliment what you observe, such as her outfit. Maybe she’s wearing an outfit that’s the same color as her nail polish or that accentuates her makeup. Let her know that you feel her outfit looks perfect. Give her compliments from your observation and move on with the conversation.
Build connections
- For a new girl, you can ask, “Have you taken on any interesting challenges recently?” or “What excites you so much?”
- If you already know her, ask about what you both have in common, such as, “What did you do last weekend?” or “How did you do that historic project?” Here’s how to give her and you a chance to share.
- If you have something to say, add it when there’s a pause. No one likes to be interrupted while speaking!
- For example, if two people are talking about studying, you could say, “Yesterday I received my Spanish test and saw the teacher circled the name. I was so confused, and then realized I spelled my name wrong!”
- Avoid casually telling jokes as that makes it seem like you’re trying too hard.
- Tell her story briefly so she doesn’t get bored and pay close attention to see if she’s still interested in what you have to say. If you see her staring at an unknown point, end the story and change the subject.
- A good initiative is to take her hand to lead her somewhere, or sit at the same table so that your feet can touch each other.
- If she feels uncomfortable or keeps your distance, you should stop.
- Many girls see this as a sign that you are a good boyfriend and can help you go from friends to lovers.
- When you’re just getting to know each other, you should ask her what colors she likes, when her birthday is, and what foods she likes to eat. Keep these in mind as they will surely come in handy at some point!
- Some girls will behave differently around their friends. Meeting her privately will help you better understand her personality and whether you want to continue spending time with her.
- For example, you could say, “Trang, your shoes are as bright as your smile!”
- If you’re close to her, avoid talking about sensitive topics that she doesn’t like. Don’t talk about looks and intelligence.
- Avoid teasing a girl you’ve just met as it can make you appear rude. You never know well the insecurities in the hearts of others; Therefore, it is best to behave politely when you first meet someone.
Closing date
- For example, you could say, “I listened to the band you introduced yesterday. I love their debut song, your taste in music is great!”
- Try to reply to her texts in about 30 minutes, unless you’re busy. Texting someone who doesn’t often respond can be frustrating, especially when she knows you’ve read the text.
- If she doesn’t reply, wait a day or two before continuing to text. Avoid mentioning her not responding and try to start another conversation. If she still doesn’t respond, accept the fact and withdraw.
- Avoid sending multiple messages in a row. This can be overwhelming and intimidating for her. Wait for her to reply to your message before sending another one.
- Consider what she likes when you ask her out, and plan what you want to do. For example, you could say, “Do you want to go see a new James Bond movie this weekend? I remember you said you liked the other episodes!”
- If she refuses, accept her decision and back out.
- Kindness will let her know you’re trustworthy – a very valuable trait. Moreover, every girl likes to be treated kindly.
- It’s okay if you can’t afford expensive appointments. In that case, plan something less expensive, like going to a free art gallery or planning a romantic get-together at the park. That allows you to be with her without the pressure of money.
- This includes being comfortable expressing what you want through flirting. If the relationship is slowly becoming more serious, you need to let her know if you are looking for a serious relationship or just want to keep the relationship at a friend level. Don’t continue to pursue her if she doesn’t have the same desires as you.
Advice
- Prepare yourself and accept the rejection. Some girls are not interested in dating or meeting new people. Respect their boundaries and learn to accept when you are rejected.
- Don’t try to be “cool” just to impress her. This rarely works. Women prefer confidence instead of showing off.
- Don’t lie about yourself. You won’t know how to explain it if she mentions it when you two have started a serious relationship.
- Don’t sound too confident or you’ll come across as arrogant or bossy. Always be yourself; This may not sound nice, but if you’re inherently shy, don’t try to act like you’re strong, lack of spontaneity can send the wrong message. Furthermore, some girls find a guy who is a bit shy or flustered to look cute.
- Don’t joke around. This makes most girls feel uncomfortable.
- Don’t flirt too much.
- Listen. Everyone wants to be heard. If two people accidentally talk at the same time, you should politely apologize and ask her to speak first.
- Observe her body language. If she keeps your distance, you are probably making her uncomfortable.
- Don’t say “you look beautiful today”. Instead, saying “you’re beautiful” will give her confidence because it means she’s beautiful every day.
- Ask her related questions so she can sense your interest. Make her feel noticed.
Warning
- Don’t flirt with two or more girls at once. It’s not serious and many girls will avoid you if they know you have a reputation as a playboy.
This article was co-written by John Keegan. John Keegan is a New York-based marriage and love expert and motivational speaker. He runs The Awakened Lifestyle, where he uses his knowledge of marriage and love, attraction and social dynamics to help people find love. He teaches and gives seminars on marriage and love internationally, from Los Angeles to London and from Rio de Janeiro to Prague. His work has been featured in the New York Times, Humans of New York and Men’s Health.
There are 11 references cited in this article that you can view at the bottom of the page.
This article has been viewed 17,420 times.
Flirting with someone is both thrilling and exciting. Whether it’s a girl you already know or just met, flirting is easy when you know what to do. By approaching her with confidence, showing her personality, and getting to know her, you will have a chance to date the girl of your dreams!
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