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This article was co-written by Julia Lyubchenko, MS, MA. Julia Lyubchenko is a consultant psychologist and hypnotherapist based in Los Angeles, California. Operating a practice called Therapy Under Hypnosis, Julia has over eight years of experience in counseling and psychotherapy, specializing in emotional and behavioral issues. She holds a certificate in clinical hypnosis from Bosurgi Method Schop and is certified in Hypnotherapy and Psychodynamic Oriented Psychotherapy. Tri holds a master’s degree in counseling psychology and marriage and family therapy from Alliant International University and a master of science in child and developmental psychology from Moscow State University.
There are 18 references cited in this article that you can see at the bottom of the page.
This article has been viewed 16,602 times.
You may be afraid of upsetting others or upsetting them when you share your feelings. However, hiding your own feelings can lead to anxiety, depression, dissatisfaction, and even poor physical health. This can also cause problems in your personal and professional relationships. Learning how to express your emotions will make you more self-aware, and as a result, your physical and mental health will be enhanced.
Steps
Be aware of emotions
- When you feel something, don’t get angry at yourself. Instead, tell yourself, “I feel that way, and that makes me happy.”
- If you have trouble understanding your body, you can try to relax by sitting comfortably in a quiet space and taking a deep breath. Repeat the mantra “What is this feeling?” to understand the body’s response to each emotion.
- Try to learn vocabulary to express the most specific feelings. For example, instead of saying “good” in general, you should use words like “delighted”, “lucky”, “very satisfied”, or “proud”. Conversely, instead of saying that you feel “bad,” you should say that you feel “frustrated,” “unsure,” “disappointed,” or “lost.” [2] X Research Sources[3] X Research Sources
- Complex emotions can arise from both primary and secondary emotions. Primary emotions are the first reaction to a situation and secondary emotions are the emotions that directly or indirectly appear after the first emotion. For example, if you break up with someone, you may feel hurt at first, and then feel that you don’t deserve that love. So let’s explain the main emotions and the secondary emotions to give yourself a more comprehensive view of your psychological development. [5] X Research Sources
Express feelings to others
- Sentences that begin with “I” will have three parts: feelings, behavior, and reasons. When you use the sentence pattern with “I”, say a compound sentence like this: “I find it extremely frustrating when you keep arguing with me about the work I’m doing because it shows that you’re looking down on yourself. my knowledge”. [6] X Research Source
- You can say something like, “I really enjoy being with you. You are a very important person in my life and I want our relationship to go further. I’m a little nervous about this, but I want to be honest with you. I feel…” [7] X Research Source
- In a formal space, start the conversation by being honest, direct, and positive. For example, you could say, “I really appreciate all of your efforts. Let’s discuss how to help you and your company succeed” [8] X Trusted Source Harvard Business Review Go to source
- Keep the conversation organized and don’t appear frustrated or annoyed by the other person’s reaction.
- They can also offer a variety of views regarding certain situations that you may not have noticed. This is a great advisory board to help you understand your feelings.
- Feedback can be a request for clarification, such as “I heard you say you feel…” or reflect on the speaker’s words by saying “That sounds important to you because …” [10] X Research Source
- Practice deep breathing at least three times a week for best results.
- Choosing the right friend is a long process and requires meeting many different people in order to find the right best friend. Make friends with people who can inspire you, support you, lift you up, and energize you when needed.
- You can also share your feelings with a psychologist, visit some popular websites, call the hotline, and even confide in the head of a religious organization.
Express feelings privately
- As you breathe, think about each emotion, its source, and how you want to respond to each emotion.
- Try to spend 20 minutes a day journaling. Don’t worry about grammar or punctuation. Write quickly to eliminate unnecessary thoughts. This is your personal diary so you don’t have to worry about it being incoherent or poorly read. [16] X Research Source
- You should try writing about a happy experience first by keeping a record of your thoughts, and then go on to write about how the experience made you feel.
- Try to describe emotions through colors, weather, or music. If you feel happy, describe what colors or weather patterns make you happy. [17] X Research Source
- Some other ways to release emotions are to practice yoga, give yourself a facial massage, and engage in a favorite activity.
- Through positive reinforcement to reward yourself for good feelings, your brain begins to associate with times when you’re feeling good on the inside, and when good things happen on the outside. . [19] X Research Resources This way, you can create conditions for yourself to think in a positive way.
- For example, your best friend is about to leave town and you feel sad and depressed because she is leaving. You can choose to avoid seeing her or start arguing with her to reduce your sadness, or you can choose to spend more time with her.
Advice
- Sometimes too many emotions are too suffocating for you to handle, and all you need to do is take some time off. This does not mean that you ignore the existence of emotions, but that you just rest and sort them out when you are ready.
- Be kind to yourself and don’t get too discouraged if you’re having a hard time expressing your feelings.
- Identifying and expressing emotions is not an easy task. We need practice to be able to understand ourselves and realize how everything around us affects each of us.
- Express your feelings through anything, as long as it’s not negative. Try to cry. If your emotions are running high, you may not be able to hold them back, but it’s much more pleasant nonetheless than keeping it to yourself.
Warning
- Do not express feelings through self-harm such as reckless actions, alcoholism, smoking habits, or self-injury. If you feel you are having a problem, then you should consult a professional.
- Don’t suppress your feelings when you can discuss it with someone, as this will only hurt you in the long run.
This article was co-written by Julia Lyubchenko, MS, MA. Julia Lyubchenko is a consultant psychologist and hypnotherapist based in Los Angeles, California. Operating a practice called Therapy Under Hypnosis, Julia has over eight years of experience in counseling and psychotherapy, specializing in emotional and behavioral issues. She holds a certificate in clinical hypnosis from Bosurgi Method Schop and is certified in Hypnotherapy and Psychodynamic Oriented Psychotherapy. Tri holds a master’s degree in counseling psychology and marriage and family therapy from Alliant International University and a master of science degree in child and developmental psychology from Moscow State University.
There are 18 references cited in this article that you can see at the bottom of the page.
This article has been viewed 16,602 times.
You may be afraid of upsetting others or upsetting them when you share your feelings. However, hiding your own feelings can lead to anxiety, depression, dissatisfaction, and even poor physical health. This can also cause problems in your personal and professional relationships. Learning how to express your emotions will make you more self-aware, and as a result, your physical and mental health will be enhanced.
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