How to Ask Others for Help

Put your personal ego aside. A big mental obstacle to asking others for help is thinking, “If you want to do something well, do it yourself.” You’re not the only person in the world who can do it well. Or “maybe” right now you are the only one who can do it well, but if you take the time to train someone, they can do it too. People who know how to do it – they can even do it faster and better than you (You’ll gasp in amazement!) and you must not only accept it, but welcome it.

• Think logically and realistically – can you do it yourself? Will you have to work out to be able to do one thing without affecting your normal work? If so, maybe you should think about getting someone else to do some of your work. Don’t feel ashamed or incompetent because you need help doing something – you actually get “better” results from having help when you need it.

Don’t wait for others to volunteer. If you struggle to ask someone for help, you may have a mild form of “glorious” syndrome – you’re overwhelmed and you often wonder why people haven’t offered to help you. Be honest with yourself – when people offer to help you, do you turn them down out of courtesy? Do you wonder why they don’t “beg”? Do you think that if you were in their position, maybe you would be willing to help? If you answered “yes,” you need to “take control” of your situation. Ask for help if you need it – don’t wait for someone else to come help you, because it may not happen.

• Many people are completely oblivious to what other people are doing and chances are you can’t change that. Give up hope that the people you don’t ask for help will come to your aid; Remember that in the end you are the one who speaks out about your needs.

Don’t consider asking others for help on the negative side. Many people are afraid to ask others for help. Asking others for help can make you feel guilty, which you think of as putting a burden on others, or feel ashamed because you think (for some reason) that you are supposed to be able to do it on your own. I do everything. You take pride in your efforts and see it as proof that you are an outstanding person (this is another manifestation of dignity). If you think asking others for help shows your incompetence, you need to get rid of that thought immediately . The opposite is true: in some ways, trying to do things on your own is a sign of weakness, it shows that you don’t have a realistic view of your own abilities.

Learn to trust others. If you’re afraid to ask others for help because you think they can’t do it as well as you can, remember two things: first, most people can do something well with enough practice and second. , you are probably not as good all-rounder as you think. When you ask for help, you not only have free time for yourself – you also give the helper a chance to practice a new skill or find a way to tackle a new type of task. Be patient – with enough time, the person helping you will be qualified to do the job you ask as well as you do. If the work you ask for is “very” important, it only takes time for the person helping you to learn how to do it well. But if the work is “really” very important, think twice before asking someone else for help!

• Even if you are “the” best person to do the job you intend to ask, think that if you ask someone else to help you, you will have time to do other things. If you’re the person in the office who does the relatively tedious job of assembling hard drives at best, but you have an important speech to prepare, you should ask an intern to do it for you. You’ll do much better if you prioritize difficult and complex tasks – don’t think it’s mean to ask others to do simple and tedious tasks when you have more important things to do.