How long should I wait for someone to respond to a message before giving up? 11 tips for you

Have you ever sat by the phone waiting for a response from someone special to you? And how long should you wait before giving up? If the other person hasn’t responded and you’re not sure how they feel, we’re here to help. Read everything you need to know about how long to wait for an answer and how to stay impatient until you decide not to wait.

Table of Contents

Give the other person about a week to respond.

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A week is enough time for the other person to think carefully and answer. The person you’re talking to may still be interested even if they’re silent. It sure feels like an eternity while you wait for them to get back in touch, but let’s just hope they’ll text back. Maybe they’ll remember what it was like to chat with you and will send you a message. ^{[1] X Research Source}

It’s a bit outdated, but some people still wait 3 days after the date to text back to make you miss them even more.
Waiting longer than a week can be a sign that they’re not interested, and it’s probably best to let the conversation pass.

Just believe they mean well.

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The other person might be really busy or miss your message. Instead of jumping to conclusions, you should think well of the person you texted if they haven’t responded yet. You can’t tell for sure what’s wrong with them or they’re stuck with something really important, so think optimistically that they’re not ignoring your messages. ^{[2] X Trusted Source Greater Good Magazine Go to Source}

Even if you fear that you will be ignored, try to think of positive things, such as the person smiling when they see your messages.

Review their previous responses.

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The person you’re talking to may not like communicating via text. Go back through previous messages to see how often they messaged you. If each time it takes a long time for you to receive their response, the time you are waiting this time is also normal. ^{[3] X Research Sources}

If they’re constantly texting you back and forth, then this could be a sign that something’s up or that they’re slowly losing interest.

Check the quality of their messages.

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If the other person put a lot of effort into past messages, that’s a good sign. Read their messages again to see what they say. Even if the other person doesn’t send a lot of messages, their long and thorough messages show that they enjoy talking to you. Maybe they are just distracted and missed your last message. ^{[4] X Research Sources}

If they send you short texts all the time or don’t seem interested in the conversation, it’s a sign that they’re not really giving you their full attention.

Think about whether your last message really needs a reply.

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If your last message discourages continuation of the conversation, the other person may not reply. Perhaps they don’t feel the need to respond to confirmation messages or have nothing more to say. Instead of anxiously waiting for them to respond, imagine them smiling when they see your message. For example, some of the following messages don’t make people feel the need to respond: ^{[5] X Research Source}

“Greet.”
“So cool!”
“OK, see you later!”

Focus on yourself and other relationships.

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You’ll be less stressed if you don’t constantly check your phone. Find something to do that doesn’t involve your phone, like take a walk, read a book, or do whatever you enjoy. Reach out to friends and family to chat and spend time with them, so you’ll be less likely to think about the other person not texting you back. ^{[6] X Trusted Source American Psychpogical Association Go to Source}

Send one more message to get the other person’s attention.

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Start a new conversation if you think the other person missed your message. If you’ve waited a few days or a week, the wait is long enough. Find a new topic instead of repeating the previous message. Don’t mention that they didn’t respond to you, as that will sound like passive aggression. ^{[7] X Research Sources}

“Hi there! Hope all is well with you! Did you have any fun today?”
“My God, I just had the craziest day at work. I hope you’re not too busy!~”
“Hi 😊 I finally watched the movie Batman . You’re right, the movie is great!! I want to hear what you think.”
Avoid sending a long line of messages, as it can overwhelm the other person reading and catching up on what you have to say. ^{[8] X Research Sources}

Try calling them.

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You can get a better sense of how the other person is feeling through their voice. If you still don’t get a response, call them to inquire. Listen to them explain what they’ve been up to and how they’ve been feeling the past few days, and don’t get upset that they don’t respond to your messages. If they seem sincere and apologetic, it’s a good sign that they still care and want to stay connected with you. ^{[9] X Research Source}

If the other person gives a short answer or doesn’t sound very excited, they probably don’t want to invest in your relationship.

Re-evaluate the connection between you and the other person.

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Perhaps you find that you don’t have strong feelings for the other person anymore. While you wait for their message, think about how they make you feel while chatting. Even if you still find them attractive, think back to how deep the connection is between the two of you or if you both have equal values. ^{[10] X Research Source}

If you notice that they seem quite different and the two sides do not have a close bond, it will be easier to let go.

Ignore and move on if you still haven’t heard back from them.

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You deserve someone who enjoys chatting with you. Chances are there are many people out there who are looking forward to receiving your message and want to connect with you. If the person you’re messaging doesn’t respect you enough to let you know how they feel, then they’re not worth your time in the long run. ^{[11] X Research Source}

Remember – every single person you have a special connection with can provide you with an opportunity to increase awareness, status, and growth. You can also take this opportunity to review the areas that you need to make adjustments in your relationship.
Reflect back on your ultimate purpose in love. Start there to take the next step in dating and move forward.

Steps