Baby Naming Issue: Y Spellings and Honor Names

Modessa writes:

First, some background, which you are free to edit out if you choose to publish my question:

Long-time reader, first-time writer because….I’m not actually pregnant yet. My husband and I are, however, planning to start trying to conceive at the end of this year and I’m already enjoying mulling over potential names.

I’m particularly sensitive to the significance of names because I have never met anyone with my name (although I am named for my paternal grandmother) and I’ve never found my name in a baby name book. While I was mildly frustrated as a kid that I couldn’t ever buy personalized pencils or those license plates they sell at gift shops, I quickly grew out of that and now love having a unique name with a family history. I do not, however, tend to like names with “creative” spellings.

If we have a daughter, my husband and I are are strongly inclined to name her after my eldest sister, Catey Lynn. Catey is pronounced like Katie; my mother chose this spelling so that Catey would have the same initials as her grandfather.

Here’s the dilemma (finally):

I would like to use the name Caitlin to honor my sister and I prefer that spelling. I’m torn, though, because I agree with the point you have made that the honor of a namesake decreases the further away you get from the actual name of the honoree.

Spelling the name Catelyn would be truer to my sister’s name, but I don’t want people to look at the name and assume it is “creative.” Many of the negative reactions to names with y’s that are perceived as “creative” are summed up in this past post: https://www.swistle.com/babynames/2008/08/05/the-y-spelling-phenomenon

Then again, the “creative” phenomenon is popular, so presumably many people would react positively to the name? I looked up the spelling Catelyn on the SSA database, and it isn’t in the top 1000 names for the past 13 years. When I looked up Caitlin, I was surprised to see that the spelling Kaitlyn is significantly more popular.

I would love to get your and your readers’ input on my dilemma and promise to send an update if/when I have a daughter. Also, if this makes a difference, the middle name would be Jane (my mother’s middle name) and she would be given my husband’s last name, which is similar to Pristorius, so the choice is between:

Caitlin Jane Pristorius

Catelyn Jane Pristorius

All the best,

Modessa

PS: Even more detail, but I can’t help myself! Part of my preference for the spelling Caitlin is that I perceive it as being more traditional, and I have always appreciated having one unusual name and a traditionally spelled last name (which is why I kept my maiden name). My husband and I have already decided to give our children his name, which is unusual and frequently misspelled. Would I be setting my daughter up for endless frustration if I gave her two unusual names? Given that the spelling Kaitlyn is more popular than Caitlin now, it seems like she is going to have to spell her first name out for people regardless of whether we choose Caitlin or Catelyn. I could go back and forth forever, which is why I need feedback from someone with a neutral perspective.

There are two broad categories of names spelled with the letter Y: those that happen to be spelled with a Y, and those where a Y has been put in place of the usual letter in order to change the appearance/style of the name. An easy example is Emily: clearly that’s name spelled with a Y, not a Y spelling. A slightly more difficult example is Evelyn—but again, that’s not a Y-spelling, it’s just a name with a Y in it. Same with Peyton, Layla, Lydia, and Taylor: not Y-spellings. Emylie and Evylyn, on the other hand, are Y spellings.

The line between the two categories can get blurry. Is Mikayla a Y spelling, or not? Michaela is the original spelling, and yet Mikayla FEELS like an alternate spelling to me, not like a Y-spelling. Sometimes a spelling starts out as a Y-spelling but then becomes a standard alternate spelling, losing its connotation of Y-for-creativity. To be “a Y-spelling,” there needs to be the feeling that the name was spelled with a Y on purpose to make it special in some way: more unusual, or more feminine. Madisynne, for example, or Kamryn.

All this is to say that although Caitlin is the original spelling, I think of pretty much all -lyn names as alternate spellings, not Y spellings. It doesn’t look creative to me to use Caitlyn or Katelyn instead: perhaps those seemed Y-spellingish when they first emerged, but now they just seem like other ways to spell the name. There is even room to argue that the -lyn is more appropriate, since the original spelling Caitlin was pronounced more like Cat-leen or Cath-leen. Or it could be argued that there are two sound-alike names here: that Caitlin is Irish, but that Katelyn is Kate + Lynn (like Maryanne or Marybeth) and can be spelled a variety of ways (like Marianne and Maribeth).

So that’s my first point: I think you can spell Caitlin with a -lyn and not come across as someone who would use Madysyn. Many spellings of Katelyn/Caitlin are currently accepted as natural, non-creative spellings; you’d probably have to go to something like Kaytelinn before you’d activate the sensors. If anyone’s eyebrows did twitch, the explanation of the reasons behind the spelling ought to take care of that.

My second point has to do with the honor factor. I agree that Catelyn seems like the most honor-y choice—but I’d say that going with Caitlin wouldn’t make a huge difference. When someone wants to name a daughter Madison after Grandma Mildred, I wonder if they’ve considered how honored they’d feel by that if they were Grandma Mildred. But if someone names a daughter Catherine after Grandma Cathryn, it seems like a much smaller step away. And since you’re already going from Catey Lynn to Caitlin/Catelyn, the spelling difference feels like it’s tied to the name change rather than being a second step away.

In short, I feel like both choices are good choices for different reasons. You’re a bit stuck here: you don’t like creative spellings, but you want to honor someone with a creatively spelled name; neither option is going to fully satisfy both preferences. I think if I were you, it would come down to weighing the things that make the spellings different, to see which feels closer to what you want: the stronger connection to your sister’s name on one hand, the original/traditional spelling on the other hand. I’m not sure which way I’d go if it were me. I might use Catey Lynn!

As for having two names she’ll have to spell, I’m afraid she’s stuck with that no matter what: there are just so many ways to spell Caitlin. But I don’t think of it as a huge deal: I think it’s so common now for people to have to spell both.