Evander Holyfield: My family values

I was the youngest of nine children and had a good childhood. I had someone to love me. I had a mother and my brother and sisters, and my grandmother. My mother taught me to listen and never to quit and that the only thing standing in the way for me was excuses.

With eight brothers and sisters, life was competitive for me because they beat me at everything. One of my goals as a kid was to be better than my brother and sisters. But my mother didn’t give me no excuses about them being older or better. She just said: “You’ve got to work harder.” So that gave me the backbone of who I am today.

It’s impossible for one parent to take on the role of mother and father, but my momma did the best she could. And I was fortunate enough to go to a boys’ club where they had men who were role models to me. They were able to give me some of the things my mother wasn’t able to give me. My trainer, Carter Morgan, was an older man and he taught me the skills of boxing, but he also he taught me respect.

The first time I saw my father was when I was 21 and came back from the 1984 Olympics with a bronze medal. I didn’t even know he existed, but my mother took me to see him. I asked her: “Why would I want to see him now? I’m rich.” She said: “Because I want you to.” From that time, my father and I had a great relationship until he passed away.

The differences weren’t between my father and me but between him and my mother. I knew it was impossible for them to live together because of the way my mother talked. As a man I realised that I couldn’t have put up with my momma if I wasn’t her kid. When you’re not born under that, it’s not something that you’re going to put up with.

I’ve been married three times. We’re separated now and I think it’s probably over. My kids from that marriage are four and five years old so I don’t think it affects them that much. If they were 14 or 15, then it would, but not at four or five. At that age it don’t bother them and from their lookout they think they’ve got two houses. They look at it as two families: they like being with her [Candi Calvana Smith] but they like going places with me.

I’ve got 11 children and one in the oven. It’s the word of God. He blesses us in numbers and I’m going to be real blessed if I got 12. Either way you look at it, I’ve got a lot of people to look after me when I get old. Everybody’ll come on different days and maybe they’ll double up or whatever, but it’ll be all good. I ain’t got to worry about only having one kid to take care of me.

I’m a disciplinarian father. If you don’t discipline kids they’ll run you out of the house. That was what my momma taught me and it’s what I teach my own. Even when I became world heavyweight champion, my momma said: “I don’t want to hear you bragging.” I never once talked back to my mother, and so far none of my kids have dared talk back to me.

My mother didn’t like me boxing but she realised life is not about her or her feelings. She was able to see it was an opportunity for her son to be a success. The mothers of my kids who won’t let them box, they say: “What if he gets hurt?” That’s like a slap in my face, saying I can’t train the kids. If I know how not to get hurt, you think I can’t teach my kids how not to get hurt?

Evander Holyfield is an ambassador for RealDealPoker.com