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This article was co-written by Adam Dorsay, PsyD. Dr. Adam Dorsay is a psychologist working for a private company in San Jose, CA. He specializes in helping successful but troubled people in love and marriage, reduce stress and anxiety, and help them be happier in life. In 2016, he gave a TED talk on men and men’s feelings. He is the co-founder of Project Reciprocity, an international program at Facebook’s headquarters, and currently advises Digital Ocean to support their Safety Team. He received his doctorate in clinical psychology in 2008.
There are 15 references cited in this article that you can view at the bottom of the page.
This article has been viewed 6,214 times.
Happiness can be many things to many people; For some people, happiness is riding a roller coaster while for others, happiness is holding a newborn baby. While happiness varies from person to person, many factors can contribute to a happy life and feeling like a happy person. Paying attention to your attitude and making changes in your daily life can help you live a life filled with joy and happiness.
Steps
Change your Attitude
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Positive thinking. Having a challenge-free life is impossible, but your attitude makes all the difference in how you face life’s challenges. Positive thinking means you approach difficulties with an optimistic outlook. It doesn’t mean that you avoid or put aside unpleasant things, but that you see the best in the situation. [1] X Trusted Source Mayo Clinic Go to Source
- Positive thinking means reminding yourself that negative problems are temporary and an opportunity to learn and grow. Instead of diving into the negative, find ways to learn from each situation. For example, don’t think negatively when you walk to work and it’s always raining. Use this situation to realize: it might be time to buy an umbrella or a pair of rain boots.
- One way to practice negative thinking is to pay attention to your inner voice. [2] X Trusted Source Mayo Clinic Go to the source Instead of thinking “I’m going to fail this time” replace it with “I’m bravely trying something new and I can’t control it. result”.
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Express gratitude often. Learning to accept the big and small things in life can have a profound impact on your life. Get in the habit of saying “thank you” often. Some people write gratitude journals, draw pictures of gratitude, or take pictures of what they are grateful for every day. Expressing gratitude not only makes you feel happy, it can also positively affect your physical and psychological health and boost your self-esteem. [3] X Research Sources
- When you feel a negative thought coming, notice it, and then replace it with something you’re grateful for. You might be surprised at how quickly your emotions can change!
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Live in the present. Life can be hectic and it’s easy to get caught up in the to-do, plan ahead, and what’s next. The truth is that your body is always in the present but your mind may be in the past or the future. If you feel you have lost touch with yourself or others, practice directing your thoughts and attention to the present moment. Use your senses to bring you back, one at a time: capturing the sounds you hear, even the things you don’t want to hear. Use your eyes and look around. Pay attention to every scent. It is not necessary to name what you are feeling, just feel it. [4] X Research Sources
- Connect with the breath. Breathing in awareness can help bring you back to your body.
- Listen to your mind. Let the mind run after all the thoughts it wants to feel without having to participate in or respond to the thought. [5] X Research Source When thoughts come, acknowledge them without judgment. For example, say, “I’m thinking about a busy day ahead.” You don’t need to analyze or judge the thought, just acknowledge it.
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Deal with stress every day. While you can’t stop billing or take a break from work or school deadlines, you can learn to manage your reactions to everyday stressors in a healthy way. strong. By doing stress management every day, you can deal with daily stress instead of letting it grow. [6] X Trusted Source HelpGuide Go to the source You may not realize it, but you can deal with stress in many ways: someone chooses to smoke, drink or get tired of watching TV or playing games. video games, or computers as coping strategies, although they are not recommended and are particularly unhealthy. [7] X Trusted Source HelpGuide Go to the source Instead, do things that relax your mind and body.
- Practice yoga, meditation, and relaxation regularly to recover.
- Perform progressive muscle relaxation every day. Find a comfortable position, sit or stand, and relax your body. Relax and breathe deeply. Start on the right first, tense, then release. Then stretch the forearm and then the upper arm, stretch the muscles and then release. Do the whole body: right arm, then left arm, face, neck, back, chest, hips, and legs and feet. Eventually, your muscles won’t feel the stretch anymore. [8] X Research Sources
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Satisfied episode. It is easy to get caught up in consumerism; means believing in the following (car, house, wallet, shoes, video games) that will make you happy. People who are rich and have a lot of money often do not have high levels of happiness. [9] X Research Resources Make sure your basic needs for money are met, and having too much money aside from meeting basic needs, they end up being meaningless in your life. Be content with what you have and learn not to ask for what you don’t have.
- Instead of spending money on these things, spend money on experiences. [10] X Research Resources Attend a festival, attend a conference that interests you, and travel. The memories you have from your vacation in Machu Picchu will be worth far more than the memories of when you played video games.
- If there’s something you want to risk your life for, think about how it will affect your life five years from now, and whether it still matters then.
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Avoid living in the past. Maybe something happened that you regret, or you wonder if you could have done it differently. Do not allow yourself to live in a time that no longer exists. Reflecting on past events can lead to negative thoughts, depression, and anxiety. [11] X Research Source Instead, use the situation to solve any future problems and think about how you might react differently. You cannot change the past, but you can change the future.
- Identify the fear that causes you to reflect on the past. Maybe you’re afraid of being an idiot or being shunned, or that people think you lack social skills. Take time each day to jot down the fears that keep you living in the past. [12] X Research Source
- Ignore what is beyond your control. Ask yourself what you can change (if anything). If you can change a lot of things, determine what can be changed and how you will address them. [13] X Research Source
- When reflecting on the past, don’t rely solely on your negative self-judgment. Also, remember what you did well and when you reacted positively. [14] X Research Source
Influence Your Actions
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Surround yourself with positive people. A major factor affecting your happiness is the people around you. You can be around people you don’t like, whether at school or at work. But don’t let them slow you down. Having good friends allows you to have a sense of belonging and support. Having friends who are upbeat and supportive in life is an important part of emotional health and happiness. [15] X Trusted Source Mayo Clinic Go to Source
- If there’s someone in your life who is always pessimistic or complaining incessantly, consider letting them out of your life. Don’t let people with negative attitudes affect your happiness.
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Forgive. You may feel justified in holding a grudge against someone who has deeply hurt you. It is important for you to realize that holding grudges does not harm others, it only creates deeper wounds in your heart. Forgiveness helps you heal, but not just for you or for others. You forgive because you eventually realize that’s the best response. [16] X Trusted Source Greater Good Magazine Go to Source
- Forgiveness doesn’t mean justifying someone else’s behavior or pretending it didn’t happen. Forgiveness is a way to free yourself and others from pain and hurt.
- Point out your inner pain and what has caused you deep hurt. [17] X Trusted Source Greater Good Magazine Go to Source Does the offense cause feelings of abandonment, hurt, or unhappy memories of the past? Record your feelings and realize the deeper hurt this person has caused.
- You can silently forgive others in your heart without having to talk formally. This is especially important when the person who wronged you is no longer in your life or has passed away.
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Do your hobby regularly. Do things that make you happy and excited. Hobbies help you deal with stress, can provide you with social circle, and make you and your life more enjoyable. [18] X Ski Research Source . Sew or create a piece of wood. Take a walk in the park! Whatever it is, have fun with your hobbies and activities.
- Not sure what your preferences are? Follow the things you care about. You have the opportunity to discover many things you may like. Try going for a hike or taking a soap making class. Try out different sports, both team and individual sports. Explore the things that interest you and find out what interests you most.
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Meditation. Meditation has many positive effects on your daily life such as reducing stress, reducing anxiety and increasing love. [19] X Research Source Although traditionally thought meditation is sitting still and relaxing the mind, it can take many forms, such as running, walking, drawing.
- Some people choose to meditate on certain words (like “love” or “forgive”) and sit quietly thinking about these words.
- Other breathing meditation exercises often focus on conscious inhalation and exhalation. Sitting meditation is usually done by sitting comfortably, closing your eyes, and relaxing your body and breathing.
- One method of meditation that helps increase positive feelings for oneself and others is called loving-kindness meditation. Loving and benevolent meditation is directed towards good wishes or wishes for oneself and then for others. You should start by thinking of 3-4 phrases you would like to happen in your life, such as “May I be healthy, may I be happy every day, and may I love and to be loved”. Say it to yourself first, then to the person you love. Next, send it to someone you feel neutral (a salesperson who sits next to you on the bus). Then, send that meditation to someone you really don’t like. Finally, direct the meditation to everyone in the world (“May everyone be healthy, may everyone be happy every day, and may everyone love and be loved”).
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Practice. Exercising as part of your daily routine can help you feel good both physically and mentally. Exercise improves health, self-esteem, sleep, and happiness. Exercise benefits both body and mind, and can even help you sleep better. [20] X Trusted Source National Health Service (UK) Go to Source
- Experts recommend that adults spend 150 minutes a week engaging in a variety of physical activities. [21] X Trusted Source National Health Service (UK) Go to Source This can include walking the dog, riding a bike to work, jumping on a trampoline and playing outside with your child.
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Be a volunteer. Volunteering allows you to step out into life and help other people’s lives. Volunteering can give you a sense of purpose in life and even add to the happiness that comes with volunteering. [22] X Trusted Source HelpGuide Going to a resource Volunteering can also be a good way to meet people who share your passion.
- Decide where you want to volunteer and who you want to help. If you love animals and want to take care of them, volunteer at an animal sanctuary or animal shelter. If you want to play with kids, volunteer at a school or children’s organization. If you have an interest in aged care, volunteer at a nursing home. There are countless options available to you, and your contribution to society will greatly benefit others.
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Let life be full of happiness. Fill your life with positive influences. Listen to a happy, happy song, sing, dance, and laugh. Or watch a performance, call a friend, read a book, or even add some color to your life by painting. Create optimism around you.
- Know the things that will lift your spirits. Maybe you like watching videos of pandas surfing, or like watching videos of cats. Doing these things improves your mood and helps you feel good.
Advice
- Avoid people who make your life miserable and sad and spend time with people who make your life brighter.
- Do things that make you feel great every day. Even simple things like journaling or nail polish.
- Adopt a pet! If you are capable of taking care of another animal, a pet can be a wonderful addition to your family, and is sure to bring you lots of laughter and joy.
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This article was co-written by Adam Dorsay, PsyD. Dr. Adam Dorsay is a psychologist working for a private company in San Jose, CA. He specializes in helping successful but troubled people in love and marriage, reduce stress and anxiety, and help them be happier in life. In 2016, he gave a TED talk on men and men’s feelings. He is the co-founder of Project Reciprocity, an international program at Facebook’s headquarters, and currently advises Digital Ocean to support their Safety Team. He received his doctorate in clinical psychology in 2008.
There are 15 references cited in this article that you can view at the bottom of the page.
This article has been viewed 6,214 times.
Happiness can be many things to many people; For some people, happiness is riding a roller coaster while for others, happiness is holding a newborn baby. While happiness varies from person to person, many factors can contribute to a happy life and feeling like a happy person. Paying attention to your attitude and making changes in your daily life can help you live a life filled with joy and happiness.
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