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This article was co-written by Hilary Jacobs Hendel, LCSW. Hilary Jacobs Hendel is an AEDP Certified Psychotherapist & Emotional Educator in New York. With nearly 20 years of experience, she specializes in helping others understand emotions and how emotions affect the mind with the tool The Change Triangle. Hilary is also the author of “It’s Not Always Depression: Working the Change Triangle to Listen to the Body, Discover Core Emotions, and Connect to Your Authentic Self” – a book that won the 2018 Best Book Award in the category Psychology/Mental Health, Silver Nautilus Award for Personal Development (Large Publisher). Hilary has published numerous articles in The New York Times, TIME magazine, Oprah.com, NBC Think, Salon.com and Fox News. She is also a consultant psychologist on AMC’s Mad Men. Hilary also co-developed the Emotions Education 101Turnkey Curricilum curriculum. She organizes emotional education classes for the community on Zoom and trains professionals to run these classes in a variety of agencies, schools, and businesses. She holds a BA in Biochemistry from Wesleyan University and a Master’s degree in Social Work from Fordham University.
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Feeling scared is a natural response to specific situations, such as being in the dark at night. Panic is rooted in fear, and it’s part of the body’s “fight or flight” response that helps us recognize that we’re in danger. [1] X Research Sources Dangers can be physical or psychological, and they often push us to the brink of anxiety. [2] X Research Resources Reeve, J. (2001). Learn Motivation and Emotions. The problem occurs when your natural fear response begins to interfere with your daily life, including during sleep. Becoming fearful at night can negatively affect sleep and quality of life for both children and adults. [3] X Research Sources
Steps
Coping with Anxiety at Night
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Avoid napping. When you stay up late, you will wake up tired, not alert, and in the middle of the day, you will want to take a nap. However, napping for an extended period of time can make it difficult to fall asleep at night. Also, when you feel tired in the evening and want to go to bed, you won’t have the time and energy to feel scared. [4] X Research Sources
- If you feel that you need to take a nap because you’re too tired and can’t carry on with your workday, you should take a “quick nap” before lunchtime. [5] X Source of Research Taking a short 15 – 20 minute nap can have great benefits for you such as increased energy and alertness and increased productivity. This short nap is all that most people really need to stave off sleepiness and give them the extra energy they need to get on with their day. [6] X Research Sources
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Practice deep breathing techniques. Focusing on deep breathing is one way to elicit a relaxation response to stress. Deep breathing, by expanding the lungs and abdomen, helps to encourage adequate oxygen exchange, which is the exchange between the act of inhaling fresh oxygen and exhaling carbon dioxide. Deep breathing slows the heart rate and helps stabilize blood pressure. [7] X Harvard Medical Schop Trusted Source Go to Source
- Sit in a comfortable position and close your eyes. Take a few breaths as usual to stabilize your body. Inhale, or draw air deep into the lungs, for 5 counts. Hold your breath for 5 counts. Then, exhale, releasing all the air, for 5 counts. Repeat a few times until you feel calmer. [8] X Research Sources
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Meditation . Meditation is also an effective tool to help you feel more relaxed. Many people find that meditating at the end of the day is particularly helpful in maintaining focus and calming the mind after a busy day. Meditation is a way to help you become more aware of your surroundings and achieve a higher level of awareness and inner peace. It is better to meditate within 1 hour before going to bed. [9] X Research Source
- You can meditate anywhere you like and for as long as you want. Essentially, this action allows you to feel a sense of peace regardless of what is going on around you.
- Sit in a comfortable position. Focus on the breath. Focus on the present and relax your body, and pay attention to your every breath. Try to clear your mind of any negative or stressful thoughts; This is the hardest part. If you feel that you are wandering, focus on counting your inhalations and exhalations. [10] X Trusted Source Mental Health Foundation Go to Source
- Some people find it helpful to focus on an object in the room, such as a candle, or focus on a certain sound, such as “um”. [11] X Trusted Source Harvard Medical Schop Go to Source
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Write diary. Journaling can help you better understand and deal with your own nighttime feelings and fears. [12] X Trusted Source University of Rochester Medical Center Go to source There isn’t any specific method of journaling; you can make a list or describe in detail how you are feeling at a certain point in time. [13] X Sources of Research[14] X Sources of Research In general, re-reading your thoughts on paper can help you identify a few important patterns that you can learn to deal with or alleviate they.
- Try to journal for 10-20 minutes a day about everything that comes to your mind. Don’t worry about spelling or grammar mistakes. You just need to allow yourself to express all of your emotions on the page. [15] X Research Source
- Ask yourself a few key questions to try to figure out what your fear is: What are you afraid of at night? What emotions often come to you at night or when you’re trying to sleep? Do you stay away from certain places or activities at night?
- Making lists can also be a pretty effective part of journaling, especially if you find that anxiety is the reason you’re having trouble sleeping. Make a “to do” list for the next day, make a list of all the positives of the day, or create a list of things you look forward to tomorrow.
Soak in a warm bath. Soaking in warm water can help you sleep well because your body temperature rises while you’re in the bath and lowers after you’re done. Lower body temperature can help you fall asleep more easily.
- You should shower about 2 hours before bed because your body needs time to raise and lower its temperature so you can fall asleep more easily. [16] X Research Source
- To enhance the soothing effect of a warm bath, you can add a few essential oils or a relaxing scent. You should consider using a bubble bath or soap with lavender. Research has shown that smelling lavender can have a calming, calming, and sedative effect. [17] X Research Source
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Control what you eat before going to bed. Avoid overeating before bed. In addition, you should also not use stimulants such as coffee, nicotine, alcohol, caffeine, and/or sugar within 4 hours of bedtime. Stimulants keep your brain awake, and can make it hard to stop worrying or calm down before bed. [18] X Research Sources
- However, having a snack about 2 hours before bed can be quite helpful. You can eat bananas and drink low-fat milk or use a small handful of almonds. [19] X Research Source[20] X Research Source
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Turn on the light. Night lights aren’t just for kids. You should leave a night light in the hallway or bathroom instead of your bedroom as it can be a distraction. Light can affect your sleep habits, keep your circadian clock from entering the ready-to-sleep phase, and prevent you from getting a good night’s sleep. [21] X Research Source
- Leaving lights on in your home will also make you more aware of your surroundings and help ease any fear of the dark that you may have.
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Make white noise. You can use white noise, such as a fan or background noise, or any kind of instrumental music that can soothe and block out other sounds that might trigger your fear. [22] X Research Sources[23] X Research Sources
- You can find white noise generators designed with a variety of sounds to help you sleep better. In addition, there are many phone apps that include relaxing sounds and/or white noise to help you fall asleep.
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Make sure your home is safe. When your night terrors are rooted in safety reasons, such as someone breaking into your home, you can take steps to make your home safer.
- Lock the door in the house.
- Pull the curtains to provide privacy.
- If this can help you feel safe, you can keep an item by your bed so you can use it for your own protection. However, you should avoid keeping items with you that you or someone in your home could use to harm yourself or others, such as guns or knives. Instead, choose heavier items, such as books or paperweights. Placing these items next to you will help you feel safer and also prevent an increased risk of danger in your home.
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Consider room temperature. Room temperature can affect the length and quality of your sleep. Your body temperature will drop as you sleep, and a room that’s cool, rather than too hot, can help with this process and make it easier to fall asleep and sleep better. But if the room temperature is too cold (or too hot), you will have a hard time falling asleep and will wake up frequently. Although researchers have not been able to determine a specific ideal temperature for this process, because what is comfortable for one person may not be suitable for another, you should generally try Make sure your room temperature is between 18 – 22°C. [24] X Research Sources
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Distract yourself. Distractions with the right dose. “The right dose” means distracting yourself just enough to get your own attention and emotions, but not so much that you get too excited or excited and unable to sleep. [25] X Research Sources
- Read a book. Avoid reading any book that is too exciting or scary. You should read a book that interests you and can immerse yourself in it. It will help you focus on the plot and/or theme rather than your fears.
- Watch TV or use computers, tablets and mobile phones. There is mixed evidence about the effects of technology use before bedtime on your sleep. The most recent research indicates that watching TV or using technology interferes with your sleep. However, if you want to use technology to distract yourself a few hours before bed, this method can be quite helpful in helping you stop thinking about your fears. Just remember to stop using them about 1 or 2 hours before you plan to go to bed. [26] X Research Source
- Listen to soothing music. Music will help you relax, and make you feel comfortable and happy.
- Count numbers. You can count up or down as long as you can help you focus your thoughts on something other than your fear until you feel that you are dozing off.
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Pray. Many people find that praying before bed is relaxing and helps ease anxiety and fear. [27] X Research Source
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Think positively and rationally. You should think about “happy” things before you go to sleep – be it about family, friends, your favorite activities, etc. You should remember all the good things in life and the people. that you love and they love you too; around you is love and protection.
- It can be quite helpful to stop and think rationally. For example, if you live in an apartment, almost any sound that makes you panic is probably just the sound of people living in your building. Floor creaks, whispers, door slams, etc., are not signs that bad things are going to happen to you, but that you’re just living next to other people – and that you’re not in one. me!
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Ask for help. Don’t hesitate to ask for help. Sometimes, feeling isolated from the outside world at night is what adds to your fear.
- If you’ve never been alone before and you’ve just moved into a new room, dorm or apartment, you can find support by asking a friend or relative to sleep with you in your room. new on the first night.
- You can also save the phone number of a friend who stays up late and is available in case you wake up from a nightmare or can’t fall asleep and want to chat with someone.
Helping Children Overcome Fear at Night
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Talk to children about their fears. Let your kids talk to you about what scares them at night. But don’t force young children to talk about this if they’re not ready. Keep in mind that children’s fears may vary depending on their developmental stage. For example, young children often won’t be able to tell the difference between real and imagined things. [28] X Research Sources
- Never tell a child that their fear is “ridiculous” or “silly”. Instead, you should acknowledge their fear and help them overcome it. You should remember that you were once a kid too and you also had quite a few silly fears! [29] X Research Sources
- You should talk about your child’s fears during the day, when they don’t feel scared. Discuss ways to make your child feel less frightened at bedtime. In addition, you should also build their confidence during the day; praise their “courage” and “boldness”. The idea here is that making your kids feel safe and confident during the day will help them at night. [30] X Research Source
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Do not support or form fear in young children. Once you know the nature of your children’s fears, you shouldn’t support their fear, even if unintentionally, by formally acknowledging and acknowledging it. For example, if your child is afraid of monsters, you shouldn’t pretend to pick up monster-killing spray or check to see if their room has monsters. This action just makes your child think that you also believe in the existence of monsters.
- Instead, you should consider talking to young children about the difference between fantasy and reality. For example, if your child is afraid of monsters hiding under the bed because they have seen the movie Monster Company (Monsters, Inc.), you should let them know that movies are just made up by other people and don’t exist at all. Real. You may have to repeat this conversation many times before your kids develop a more logical and rational perception. [31] X Research Source
- Continually reassure your young children that they are safe at all times. You should constantly talk about their safety. [32] X Research Source
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Monitor what your kids watch. Do not allow them to watch scary TV shows or play scary or violent games. These will only add to their fears before going to bed. [33] X Research Source[34] X Research Source
- In general, you should try to limit your child’s viewing of TV or other electronic device use before bedtime as this can make it difficult for them to fall asleep. Instead, read to them (again, not scary stories!) or read books together. Research has shown that reading stories to children before bedtime can help enhance a child’s ability to learn and develop and at the same time help form a bond between parents and children. [35] X Research Source
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Bathe your child with warm water. The reason is because the body’s temperature will increase during the bath and decrease after the process is over. Lower body temperature can help people fall asleep more easily.
- You should bathe your baby about 2 hours before bed because the body needs time for the temperature rise and fall. [36] X Research Source
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Make your little one’s room the perfect place to sleep. You should make sure their room is tidy before they go to sleep and that you clean up any items that are scattered around the room. In the dark, children’s eyes can deceive them. Organizing everything in the right place will help your child avoid mistaking ordinary items for bad things. A well-organized bed – just before bedtime! – can help you create favorable conditions for the sleep of your children.
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Add items that bring comfort to the room. You should arrange more pillows around the children so that they feel safe and cozy. Place something dear next to your child, such as a special blanket, stuffed animal, or family photo, next to their bed. These little items not only make children more comfortable, but they also help them feel safer around them with the things they love. [37] X Research Source
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Leave the night light on. Since many children have a fear of the dark, a night light can provide a sense of peace when they go to sleep. You can find night lights in fun shapes and sizes. You can accompany your child so that they can choose the type of night light they like and explain to them the purpose of the night light. You should let your child take an active role in overcoming his or her own fears. [38] X Research Source
- If the light interferes with your child’s ability to fall asleep and stay asleep, you should remove it. You can use a dimly lit night light, as long as it doesn’t disrupt your baby’s sleep.
- You can also open the door to the child’s bedroom slightly or completely. Keeping the door open will help alleviate any fears associated with being away from parents during bedtime. [39] X Research Sources
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Bring your pet into the room. Hugging a pet can make people feel better. [40] X Trusted Source PubMed Central Go to Source[41] X Trusted Source PubMed Central Go to Source A cat retreating around its legs, a dog lounging on the floor, or even soft sounds The soothing sound of a water filter in an aquarium or the sound of wheels in a hamster tank can provide comfort at night. [42] X Research Source
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Lie down with young children for a short period of time. If at first, your child is extremely scared and can’t sleep alone in the room, you can completely sit next to or lie on the bed with them until they fall asleep. However, you should not do this on a regular basis. If the act becomes part of the bedtime routine (even if it happens for 2 days in a row), it can become a hindrance and your baby won’t be able to sleep without you around. [43] X Research Source
- If your kids are afraid to be alone, let them know that you’ll be back to check on them. [44] X Research Resources Start by checking on the children after 5 minutes, followed by 10 minutes, and then 15 minutes, etc., until your child is asleep. You should only conduct a short test; Do not linger in the child’s room as he may become dependent on your presence. [45] X Research Source
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Always remember to bring children back to their bed. If your child wakes up in the middle of the night and is afraid to go back to bed, you should reassure him or her that they are safe and that everything is fine. If your kids come into your room at night, you should bring them back to their bed and reassure them again. It is important that you do not allow your child to sleep in the same bed as you. Children need to learn to recognize that their bed is a safe place and that nothing will happen to them. [46] X Research Source
- Allowing your child to sleep with you will not help alleviate their fear, but instead, it will only reinforce the fear and your child will not be able to learn to overcome the fear. [47] X Research Sources
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See a doctor if your child’s fear does not subside. If your child’s night terrors continue even after you’ve tried all of the methods above, or if it’s starting to interfere with their day-to-day life, you should consider taking your child to see a doctor. The doctor may conduct a more formal psychological assessment of the child. [48]X Research Source
Warning
- Traumas, worries, phobias, and other mental health disorders are not just common fears and can often take root quite deeply, making it difficult to overcome them. effectively without expert help. If you feel that you frequently face nocturnal fear and you are unable to cope with it or cannot get a normal night’s sleep, you should consult a psychiatrist who can help you diagnose your fear and establish an appropriate treatment plan.
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This article was co-written by Hilary Jacobs Hendel, LCSW. Hilary Jacobs Hendel is an AEDP Certified Psychotherapist & Emotional Educator in New York. With nearly 20 years of experience, she specializes in helping others understand emotions and how emotions affect the mind with the tool The Change Triangle. Hilary is also the author of “It’s Not Always Depression: Working the Change Triangle to Listen to the Body, Discover Core Emotions, and Connect to Your Authentic Self” – a book that won the 2018 Best Book Award in the category Psychology/Mental Health, Silver Nautilus Award for Personal Development (Large Publisher). Hilary has published numerous articles in The New York Times, TIME magazine, Oprah.com, NBC Think, Salon.com and Fox News. She is also a consultant psychologist on AMC’s Mad Men. Hilary also co-developed the Emotions Education 101Turnkey Curricilum curriculum. She organizes emotional education classes for the community on Zoom and trains professionals to run these classes in a variety of agencies, schools, and businesses. She holds a BA in Biochemistry from Wesleyan University and a Master’s degree in Social Work from Fordham University.
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Feeling scared is a natural response to specific situations, such as being in the dark at night. Panic is rooted in fear, and it’s part of the body’s “fight or flight” response that helps us recognize that we’re in danger. [1] X Research Sources Dangers can be physical or psychological, and they often push us to the brink of anxiety. [2] X Research Resources Reeve, J. (2001). Learn Motivation and Emotions. The problem occurs when your natural fear response begins to interfere with your daily life, including during sleep. Becoming fearful at night can negatively affect sleep and quality of life for both children and adults. [3] X Research Sources
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