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This article was co-written by Kelli Miller, LCSW, MSW. Kelli Miller is a psychotherapist, author, and TV/radio presenter based in Los Angeles, California. Kelli is currently in private practice and specializes in family relationships, love marriage, depression, anxiety, gender, parenting and so on. Kelli also runs groups at The Villa. The Treatment Center is for people who are recovering from alcohol and drug addiction. As an author, she received the Next Generation Indie Book Award for “Living with ADHD: A True Book for Children” and she is also the author of “Profess Kelli’s Guide to Finding a Husband” “. Kelli is the host of “The Dr. Debra and Therapist Kelli Show” on LA Talk Radio, you can see her work on Instagram @kellimillertherapy. She received her Master of Social Work degree from the University of Pennsylvania and a diploma. Bachelor of Science in Sociology/Medical from the University of Florida.
This article has been viewed 11,600 times.
Breaking up is hard, but it’s great when your ex wants to get back with you. The resumption of old love will begin after the two of you have just broken up. However, what you do can help or hurt that relationship. By taking the time to look back on the relationship, the effort on your part, and the right communication, you can win over your ex-girlfriend’s heart.
Steps
Prepare to conquer her
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Try not contacting her. Plan to not contact your ex for a while. [1] X Research Resources This includes phone calls, texting, social media interactions, and face-to-face meetings. You will not actively communicate or show any response. This is a way to give the two of you time to acknowledge and heal your feelings.
- The no-contact period will last for 21, 30 or 45 days. No matter what time period you choose, you must stick to the plan.
- Not communicating will give both of you time to heal emotionally and give your ex-girlfriend time to miss you.
- If the relationship ended badly, this period will help both of you stay calm and work through the negative emotions. [2] X Research Source
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Stop interacting with her on social media. Even if you’re no longer in contact with your ex, seeing her photos and knowing what she’s up to will make you want to contact her. Staying up to date on her life via social media will make things harder for you. In addition, you will also accidentally know some information that you should not know, such as she is dating someone else. [3] X Research Sources
- If necessary, you should unfriend or block your ex-girlfriend on social networks. You shouldn’t let your ex-girlfriend know that you’re planning to seduce her.
- You also shouldn’t write about feeling sad or hopeless after a breakup.
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Revisit the relationship. Since you are no longer in contact with your ex, you will have time to think about your past relationship. Consider the pros and cons of the relationship. Think about what you did well and didn’t do well. Besides, think about what you could change if you had the chance to get back together with her.
- Better yet, you should write a list of pros and cons on paper. This will be a way to help you see your old relationship.
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Take care of yourself. You need to be the best version of yourself. This will help you become more attractive when contacting your ex. [4] X Research Source Eat healthy and exercise. Also, you should spend time with people who love you, like friends and family. Try doing things that you didn’t have time to do when you were with your ex, such as volunteering, playing video games, reading, etc.
- If you don’t like going out a lot or meeting a lot of people, that’s okay too. Do whatever it takes to heal your feelings after a breakup, such as meditating, journaling, or spending time alone watching movies.
- If you have a bad temper or have problems in your previous relationship with her, such as anger, jealousy, insecurity, underestimating her feelings or being overly controlling, find her. how to improve that.
- Write about the type of man you want to be and start improving in each area.
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Avoid talking about her negatively. After a breakup, it’s easy to say bad things about your ex. You can say some things you don’t want to say. There’s no point in telling her bad things to her family, friends, or your friends. If your ex finds out you’re badmouthing her, you’ll lose your chance to get back together with her.
- Try to keep everything about your relationship private.
- Avoid writing about your relationship on social media. This includes hidden messages, such as lyrics, songs, or quotes.
Approaching ex-girlfriend
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Contact your ex. When the silence period is over, you will reconnect with your ex. You can email, make phone calls, write letters, or send messages. If you send an email or letter, write down that you accept the breakup, apologize for your mistakes, and tell us something interesting about your life after the breakup. [5] X Research Sources
- If you’re texting, try to create something that sparks conversation and is flirty, but doesn’t feel negative.
- Try texting “Hi, I’m watching TV and this show suddenly reminds me of you :)”. You can also text about a certain memory of the two of you. For example, “I remember when we went to eat at a restaurant…”.
- You should not bring up the issue of rekindling or that you miss her or still love her during the first contact. [6] X Research Sources
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Admit your mistake and apologize. You’ve had time to reflect on the relationship. Now is the time to admit your mistake and apologize to her. This is a way for her to know you’ve grown up and put a lot of thought into your troubles. She’s also starting to realize you’re trying to be a good man.
- You can meet her in person or call her. Better yet, you should not text with content that is too long and contains a lot of emotions.
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See you soon. Once you and your ex have reconnected, try asking her if she wants to go on a date or hang out. Try to speak calmly and politely when asking questions. Don’t make this serious. Try saying, “Do you want to go out for coffee or milk tea?” or “I’ll see you later!”. You can also use the word “hang out” instead of “date”. [7] X Research Sources
- If she hesitates, you can say, “It’s just coffee. You don’t have to worry.”
- If she doesn’t want to see you, don’t keep pushing. Give her her own space. You can say, “I respect your decision, but if you change your mind let me know. I’d be happy to see you again.”
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Flirt with her one more time. To win over your ex, you have to do things you’ve done before to get her interest. If you used to send flowers or write sweet messages, you should start doing those things again. See this as an opportunity for a new relationship. You should try to “cut” her one more time. [8] X Research Sources
- Even though you want to impress her, don’t cling or beg her to get back together. This only makes you look insecure and weak. You want her back because you’re a good man, not because she feels sorry for you. [9] X Research Source
- Don’t say “I can’t live without you”.
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Avoid talking about the past. You and your ex are starting from scratch. Focus on the positive things that made the previous relationship work. [10] X Research Source If you’ve won her over with humor, keep making her laugh. If she likes what you cook, you will prepare a delicious meal for her.
- Focus on creating new memories with her. She wants to see the difference when she comes back to you.
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Start slowly. When you get back together, you can’t continue from where you left off. Let’s start as a new relationship. Take the time to get to know each other one more time. However, you shouldn’t overwhelm her or pressure her to come back to you. You should just focus on building a strong friendship. [11] X Research Source
- Don’t text or call her every day.
- See her and do some things together. Find out her habits, likes and dislikes one more time.
- Avoid intimate contact at this time and just spend as much time chatting.
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Know when to give up. If your ex completely rejects your efforts, you need to respect her decision. If she wants to be alone or she wants to get over her old relationship, you should do the same. Being clingy or obstinate will make you worse in her eyes and destroy any chance of bringing her back to you.
- If she has a new boyfriend, you should respect her new relationship. Don’t try to get her to break up with her current boyfriend. Be patient and wait to see if her new relationship is serious or temporary.
Advice
- Breakups are heartbreaking, but you should be strong. Talk to her and if she doesn’t want to come back, you should accept it and forget it.
- Always be patient because the time to reconnect is often longer than you expect.
- If you want your ex-girlfriend back, you must always be the man she always wanted.
- Even if the two of you can’t get back together, you’ll be fine.
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This article was co-written by Kelli Miller, LCSW, MSW. Kelli Miller is a psychotherapist, author, and TV/radio presenter based in Los Angeles, California. Kelli is currently in private practice and specializes in family relationships, love marriage, depression, anxiety, gender, parenting and so on. Kelli also runs groups at The Villa. The Treatment Center is for people who are recovering from alcohol and drug addiction. As an author, she received the Next Generation Indie Book Award for “Living with ADHD: A True Book for Children” and she is also the author of “Profess Kelli’s Guide to Finding a Husband” “. Kelli is the host of “The Dr. Debra and Therapist Kelli Show” on LA Talk Radio, you can see her work on Instagram @kellimillertherapy. She received her Master of Social Work degree from the University of Pennsylvania and a diploma. Bachelor of Science in Sociology/Medical from the University of Florida.
This article has been viewed 11,600 times.
Breaking up is hard, but it’s great when your ex wants to get back with you. The resumption of old love will begin after the two of you have just broken up. However, what you do can help or hurt that relationship. By taking the time to look back on the relationship, the effort on your part, and the right communication, you can win over your ex-girlfriend’s heart.
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