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It’s actually not difficult to talk casually with someone you have a crush on, and it can even be fun if it offers the chance to hang out. Learn how to talk to your crush like a friend, make humorous comments, and ask unexpected but easy-to-answer questions to lead to more interesting connections. Even if it’s a little awkward, having an interesting conversation will make your partner want to talk to you more.
Steps
Before starting a conversation with the “dreamer”
- You need to make sure you have enough time, at least a few minutes, for the conversation. There are situations where there is not enough time for conversation, such as before class begins. This is clearly not the right time because the conversation will be interrupted by the class bell and give the impression that you are stupid for not picking the right time to start a conversation.
- Avoid starting a conversation while in line or during class changes.
- Consider how your and your partner’s schedules match. Plan a chat when you’re both free.
- Are there any upcoming events? Think about whether there’s a dance, party or school event coming up where you can talk to him/her.
- While talking to our friends, we need to try to pay attention to our intonation, hand gestures, and facial expressions. When dealing with people you like, you need to try to talk as naturally and comfortably as friends.
- Don’t be too casual with him or her as if you’ve known each other for a long time (though you’re not). For example, don’t say, “Hey, how are you doing these days?”.
- The conversation becomes awkward when you act like you know too much about him or her, the same goes for when you pretend you don’t know anything about them (when it’s not true). .
- If you are going to dance or go somewhere close and private with your partner, after brushing your teeth, you should rinse your mouth with a mint mouthwash to freshen your breath.
- Avoid eating foods that make your breath smell like onions or garlic.
- Drink a glass of water, the water will wash away the food and bacteria that cause bad breath. [3] X Research Sources
Catch up and chat
- Don’t worry, the first few remarks you make to your crush don’t make or break the conversation. Starting a conversation is even more important. So don’t worry too much about fluency, instead, focus on continuing the conversation.
- You don’t have to mention that you and your crush are in the same class, unless you’re not sure they know that. If you want to remind him or her to remember, just do it as if it were accidental, no big deal. Just say “How good was your midterm exam in English class?” It’s not strange if you know that they both studied together. If he doesn’t know, your mention of the class name will suggest implicitly, possibly he or she will apologize for not recognizing you.
- Don’t ask him or her about controversial topics. Stay away from hot issues like religion or politics. [6] X Research Source
- Avoid greeting politely or asking inquiry questions. You shouldn’t ask questions like “So where are you from?” because you will get the answer he or she has had to repeat many times before.
- This kind of fun conversation will help the two of you feel more comfortable with each other.
- Grasping is great as this will help you overcome the barrier of initial exposure. And always remember, the way the story begins is extremely important – the next important thing is the continuation of the story.
- Sometimes, just listening to what your heart tells you, you will gain your own confidence.
Maintain the conversation
- For example, if he or she shows interest in talking about books, you should ask/create book-related links. Something like, “The book you’re reading must be really good. I really like his (…)
- Or, if she/he isn’t very interested in talking about their books, you can move on to something more provocative. Say something like, “So what are your plans this week?”.
- Try to avoid bringing up the conversation about topics that show that you already know about your partner’s interests as this will make you feel unnatural. For example, if you know he plays soccer, avoid mentioning it directly. Don’t say “Tell me about your soccer league.” Instead, let the conversation flow naturally.
- Limit distractions. Don’t text or look at your phone while talking. This will make you look disinterested and you won’t really listen to what the person is saying. [9] X Research Source
- Repeat the main idea of what the person said. This shows that you are listening and gives him or her a chance to speak clearly again. Repeat most of the meaningful parts they have said. For example, you could say, “Ah, you mean you just started drawing recently, but feel like you just can’t get away from the brush?”. He/she will feel connected to you because you understand what’s important to them.
- Avoid interrupting when he or she is speaking. It’s easy to get excited by what we want to say and interrupt when the other person is talking. But, resist the urge and wait until the other person has finished saying what they mean, then show your excitement about what the other person has just said.
- Show empathy. If the person is talking about something difficult going on with them, you should not ignore this feeling when he/she talks about it. You might respond when the person says about failing the test like, “Now I understand why you seem upset when you have to take the test again.”
- Head tilting is a great way to show intimacy/funny during conversation and flirting. [10] X Research Source
- Or, if you want to be on the safer side, you can simply ask, “Hey, can I have your phone number? I really enjoyed talking to you.”
- If you feel like the conversation is just okay, you can wait a few more chats via text or face-to-face before asking the person out.
- You can make up “only two people” jokes about what you both said. For example, you could say, “Now that you and I have both made it through this lunch without water, I believe we can get through anything together.”
- Making jokes “only two people understand” will bring the two of you closer together through previous bonding, which is a great way to create a final bond before the first conversation ends.
- End the conversation randomly. You might look at your watch and say, “I have to go home now, but I’d be happy to talk to you.”
- If you’re going to meet that person in the future, talk about it. For example, “See you in English class, I hope your retest goes well.”
- A few days later, send a text to say hello and ask him or her about what you said.
wikiHow is a “wiki” site, which means that many of the articles here are written by multiple authors. To create this article, 99 people, some of whom are anonymous, have edited and improved the article over time.
There are 7 references cited in this article that you can see at the bottom of the page.
This article has been viewed 24,836 times.
It’s actually not difficult to talk casually with someone you have a crush on, and it can even be fun if it offers the chance to hang out. Learn how to talk to your crush like a friend, make humorous comments, and ask unexpected but easy-to-answer questions to lead to more interesting connections. Even if it’s a little awkward, having an interesting conversation will make your partner want to talk to you more.
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