How to Fix Your Mistakes

All of us make mistakes from time to time. Mistakes that we often make in our daily life include: making a mistake when performing a specific task (writing, typing, graphics, etc.), offending someone, doing something that you feel regret, and get involved in dangerous situations. Since mistakes are inevitable, it’s important to learn how to fix them and deal with them. Dealing with mistakes often involves processes: understanding your mistakes, planning, taking care of yourself, and communicating appropriately.

Table of Contents

Understand Your Mistakes

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Identify mistakes. First, you need to understand what you did wrong so that you can change it.

Be clear about your own mistakes. Did you say something wrong? Did you accidentally make a mistake on a company or class project? Did you forget to clean the bathroom as you promised?
Understand why and how you made the mistake. Did you do it on purpose and regret it afterwards? Are you simply not paying attention? Think to yourself about something like, “How did I forget to clean the bathroom? Was it because I didn’t want to do this so I tried to avoid it? Was it me? busy?”.
If you are not sure about your mistake, you can consult someone (friend, relative, teacher, colleague, boss) to find out. For example, if someone is upset with you, you can ask, “I notice that you are upset with me, can you explain to me why?”. The person may reply, “I’m upset because you said you would clean the bathroom but you didn’t do as you said.”

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Remember past mistakes. ^{[1] X Research Source} Look at your patterned behavior and determine if you have faced similar problems in the past. Was there ever a time when you forgot to do something?

Write about any pattern or trend that often pops up. This method will help you identify larger goals that you need to improve (attention, specific skills, etc.). For example, perhaps you often forget about tasks you don’t want to do, such as cleaning. This could be a sign that you are avoiding or that you need to become more organized to be able to remember specific responsibilities you have to fulfill.

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In charge of. Understand that the mistake is yours. Take responsibility for your own mistakes and avoid blaming others. ^{[2] X Sources of Research} If you blame others, you won’t be able to learn from your mistakes, and you may end up making the same mistakes again and again.

Write about the sides of the problem that you contributed to the formation or about a particular mistake you made.
Identify factors that you could have changed for better results.

Planning

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Think about solutions that you have used in the past. ^{[3] X Research Sources} One of the best ways to deal with a problem or mistake is to recognize how you have worked on a similar problem or mistake in the past. You might be thinking something like, “I’ve memorized my tasks pretty well in the past, how did I come to remember them? Oh yeah, I wrote them down in my calendar. and check it several times a day!”.

Make a list of similar mistakes you’ve made. Identify the method you took to deal with each mistake and find out if it worked for you. Otherwise, it may not be suitable.

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Review your options. ^{[4] X Research Source} Think of as many ways to fix the problem as possible. In the example above, there are quite a few options available to you: you can clean the bathroom, apologize, ask permission to clean another area of the house, negotiate, schedule this task for the day. later, etc.

Use problem-solving skills to think of a logical solution to your current problem.
Make a list of pros and cons for each solution. For example, if you’ve determined that the logical solution to forgetting to clean the bathroom is to make sure to do this task tomorrow, a list of pros and cons might look like this: : Pros – the bathroom will be cleaned in the end. Cons – I didn’t clean the bathroom today, I might forget tomorrow (I can’t be entirely sure I’ll remember to do this), it doesn’t help with the problem of forgetting clean the bathroom I’m facing. Based on this assessment, it’s better to clean the bathroom during the day if possible, and make a plan to remember to do this in the future.

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Decide what action you need to take and go for it. To be able to fix the problem, you need to form a concrete plan. Determine the most reasonable solution based on the available option and on the choice you have made in the past and commit to it. ^{[5] X Research Sources}

Follow until the end. If you promised to solve the problem, fulfill the promise. Being trustworthy is important in building trust with others and forming lasting relationships. ^{[6] X Research Source}

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Make a backup plan. No matter how clear your plan is, there’s a chance it won’t be able to help you fix the problem. For example, you could clean the bathroom, but the person who asked you to do the job might still be upset with you.

Identify other suitable solutions and write them on paper in order from most useful to least useful. Review the list from start to finish. Your list might include things like: asking the person to let you clean another room, repeatedly apologizing, and asking the person how they would like you to atone, or give the person something they like (food, an activity, etc.).

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Prevent future mistakes. If you can succeed in finding a solution to your mistake, you can form the right process for success and avoid making the same mistake in the future. ^{[7] X Research Sources}

Write down your thoughts about your mistake. Then write about a goal that you want to accomplish in the future. For example, if you forget to clean the bathroom, you can set goals such as: write down a list of tasks each day, check the list twice a day, mark each task complete, and write Prioritize reminders on sticky notes and stick them in the fridge.

Take Care of Yourself

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Stop putting pressure on yourself. You should understand that making mistakes is normal. You may feel guilty, but it’s important to accept yourself despite all your weaknesses. ^{[8] X Research Sources}

Forgive yourself and move on instead of wallowing in the problem you caused.
Focus on trying to do better now and in the future.

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Control your emotions. When we make mistakes, it’s easy to feel frustrated, confused, or surrendered to everything. If you feel too emotional or stressed, relax. It won’t help you if you try to fix your mistakes when your emotions are running high.

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Deal. Focusing on methods of dealing with negative emotions can help you feel better. Think about the steps you have taken to deal with past mistakes. Identify the effective method you used as well as the one that made you feel worse.

Some common coping strategies for mistakes include: positive self-talk (saying good things to yourself), exercise, and engaging in relaxing activities, for example. like reading a book or playing a game.
Some ways that won’t help you in dealing with guilt include focusing on self-destructive behavior such as: using alcohol and other drugs, physically harming yourself physically, constantly ruminating, and thinking negatively about yourself.

Communicate Effectively

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Be decisive. Using assertive communication skills means expressing your thoughts and feelings in a respectful and appropriate manner. ^{[9] X Trusted Source Mayo Clinic Go to Source} When you’re assertive, you admit you were wrong and take responsibility for your own mistakes. You don’t blame others.

Avoiding negativity, including avoiding talking about the problem, avoiding, doing whatever other people want you to do, and not standing up for yourself.
Do not show aggression, including: raising your voice, shouting, belittling, cursing, and violent behavior (throwing objects, hitting).
Avoid negative aggression. This is a combination of negative attitude and aggressive communication when you become upset but not ready to accept your own feelings. So you can do something behind other people’s backs to get revenge or cause a “cold war” with them. This is not a good form of communication and the person may not fully understand your intentions or reasons.
Send positive nonverbal messages. Non-verbal communication helps us to send messages to the people around us. A smile can mean “Hey, I should be scowling, but I can be brave and get through this.”

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Actively listen. Let the frustrated person vent their frustration and wait for their response. ^{[10] X Research Source}

Try to focus solely on listening to the other person instead of thinking about how to respond. You should focus on the other person’s feelings and thoughts instead of your own.
Form a summary statement and ask clarifying questions, such as “Did I hear you say you’re angry because I forgot to clean the bathroom?”.
Sympathy. Try to empathize and put yourself in the person’s shoes.

Advice

If the task is too difficult or confusing, take a break or ask for help.
If you can’t fix a mistake or make things better right away, focus on what you can do to do better in the future.

Warning

Don’t try to correct your mistake if it means putting yourself or others in danger. You should be mindful of your own and others’ safety, physical and mental health.

Steps