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This article was co-written by John Keegan. John Keegan is a New York-based marriage and love expert and motivational speaker. He runs The Awakened Lifestyle, where he uses his knowledge of marriage and love, attraction and social dynamics to help people find love. He teaches and gives seminars on marriage and love internationally, from Los Angeles to London and from Rio de Janeiro to Prague. His work has been featured in the New York Times, Humans of New York and Men’s Health.
This article has been viewed 3,002 times.
No matter what stage you are in in life, finding a girlfriend is not easy. While your friends have no trouble finding a lover, you are still lonely. Finding a girlfriend will involve going out into the world, being more open to meeting new people and willing to accept help from friends.
Steps
Looking for a potential girlfriend
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Define your criteria. Think about what you really want in a girlfriend. Maybe you want to find someone who shares your religious beliefs, or someone who loves children. Identify the “necessary points” about the potential girlfriend.
- Consider the primary as well as the sub-criteria. It seems like it’s important to find someone who shares your life views. However, you can also think about whether you want to find someone who shares your passion for running marathons, or a girl who is willing to watch a TV series with you, or someone who works in the same profession as you. Friend.
- While you’ll want to find a girl who’s extremely attractive, avoid prioritizing this criterion at the top of the list. Your relationship should be based on depth rather than looks.
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Step out into the world. It seems like you will have a hard time meeting people if you stay indoors. Break some of your usual routines and hang out in public areas where you can meet new people. Think about regularly visiting the following places:
- Grocery
- Bookstore or library
- Cafe
- Park
- Walking trail
- Musical Instrument Store
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Try new activities. If you’re having a hard time finding potential girlfriends to date, you need to try something new to expand your relationship. Try finding a new hobby or joining a club, such as skiing or hiking.
- Try to enjoy the activity to some degree. Don’t pretend like you’re enjoying this activity because a lot of girls do the same thing. If you don’t, you’re starting a potentially fake relationship.
- If you’re still in school, try taking a class that’s completely different from the one you’re taking. Even if you don’t feel like you’re a creative person, you can still sign up for an art or drama class. You might get to know a potential girlfriend from one of her favorite classes.
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Be open to different types of people. You’ll probably have your own standards for the type of woman you’re really attracted to. However, there are many types of people with whom you can both become good friends or potential mates. Don’t judge things by appearance.
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Make friends with women. Expand your social circle by making more female friends. Maybe at first you see her as the ideal potential girlfriend, but then decide that this can’t happen. Don’t rush to remove that person from the list. You two can still be friends. Besides, she probably has many other close girlfriends.
Get help regarding finding a girlfriend
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Let people know your search intent. A lot of relationships start because one person told his friend he was looking for a serious relationship. Your friends may know someone who is single and also looking for love and they can help you make a connection.
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Join an online dating site. Connecting with each other via online dating sites, such as e-Harmony and Match.com, is increasingly common for people. Learn about these sites and choose one to join. Fill out your profile and be open to making friends with others.
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Try blind dates. Friends and family all want to make you happy. They might introduce you to a blind date with a strange girl, which can make you feel uncomfortable. Even so, give it a shot by agreeing to a blind date. See this date as an opportunity to meet someone new and exciting.
Chat with potential girlfriends
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Approach her when and where she feels comfortable. Choose the right time and place to chat with a girl. Grocery stores, museums, cafes, and pet parks are all great places to meet girls who are always happy and in love. [1] X Research Source
- When a girl goes to a bar or disco, she is in a cautious state. Maybe she’s not looking for a long-term relationship, or she’s hanging out with other girls all night. These places aren’t ideal for connecting with other people other than just a chance encounter.
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Friendly and amiable . Usually people appreciate a sense of humour. Be friendly and make jokes to make her smile. [2] X Research Source There are many different situations in which you show them your sense of humour. Try making jokes in the following ways: [3] X Research Sources
- Everything around you. If you’re at the park or walking along the side of the road and you see something funny, talk about it.
- Humor about yourself. If you are of outstanding height, talk about how you can see the city next door from your perspective.
- Tell a funny story about yourself. Did you ever have a silly fight when you were in high school? Tell her the story and make sure you include details about the ridiculous outfit you were wearing at the time or the name of the song you danced to before the fight.
- Talk about current events. Some stories in the news or about celebrities would be a good idea to make jokes.
- These jokes can be seen as your own kind of jokes later on.
- Be careful not to show crude or offensive humor. Until you get to know the person well, avoid this type of humor at all costs.
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Praise her. Show her that you notice something about her by praising her for it. For example, you could tell her:
- “I really like you with long hair like that.”
- “You really made some smart points during the class debate today.”
- “I am very approachable and friendly.”
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Call her name. Once you know her name, make sure you use it multiple times in conversation. To remember her name, you can write it down.
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Don’t let the fear of rejection discourage you. You may feel nervous talking to a girl because she might reject you. Don’t let this fear stop you from taking the initiative to initiate a conversation. The worst case scenario is that she will ignore it or tell you to go away. But the best case scenario is that she will return to the conversation. [4] X Research Sources
- This also helps to show your confidence. See this as an opportunity to accept.
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Should not be frivolous. When you meet someone new, give her a chance even if she doesn’t meet your ideal girlfriend standards. Don’t reject others just for silly or superficial reasons.
- Make sure you don’t just compliment her looks. You can tell she looks pretty, but you should also compliment her for her artistic flair or her ingenious mobility in rush hour traffic.
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Try talking to her more than once. If you like someone but your first conversation didn’t go well, talk to her again. Maybe she was distracted or stressed the first time we met.
- You need to arrange a meeting “accidentally” with her. For example, if you first saw her at the pet park, walk your dog around the area regularly until you see her again.
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Don’t act scary or reckless. Don’t make a girl feel uncomfortable by being possessive, following her, or trying to talk to her about inappropriate topics. Give her some personal space and this will set the right tone for a potential relationship.
Improve yourself
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Confidence . Confidence will demonstrate to a potential girlfriend that you believe you deserve attention. Believe in your own abilities, respect others and believe in yourself. [5] X Research Sources
- Showing confident and positive body language communicates to others that you respect yourself and are confident. This type of body language includes frequent eye contact, smiling a lot and acting friendly, as well as standing up straight.
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Be yourself . Accept who you are and what you really like. Don’t try to be someone you can’t be. Also don’t try to please other people who want you to change. Be proud of your strengths and the qualities that make you unique.
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Towards a healthy lifestyle. This will show the potential girlfriend that you care about yourself and take good care of your body. Eat plenty of healthy foods, get enough sleep, and exercise regularly. Reduce alcohol and stop smoking.
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Spend time with friends. Don’t spend all your time looking for a girlfriend. Make sure you still make time for your friends. The important thing here is that even if you are looking for a girlfriend, you still focus on your own interests.
Advice
- Try to assess the situation before approaching a girl. If she already has a crush on her or seems indifferent, you should change your approach. However, this does not mean that you should avoid her. If she already has a boyfriend, it looks like she still has some great single girlfriends she can recommend.
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This article was co-written by John Keegan. John Keegan is a New York-based marriage and love expert and motivational speaker. He runs The Awakened Lifestyle, where he uses his knowledge of marriage and love, attraction and social dynamics to help people find love. He teaches and gives seminars on marriage and love internationally, from Los Angeles to London and from Rio de Janeiro to Prague. His work has been featured in the New York Times, Humans of New York and Men’s Health.
This article has been viewed 3,002 times.
No matter what stage you are in in life, finding a girlfriend is not easy. While your friends have no trouble finding a lover, you are still lonely. Finding a girlfriend will involve going out into the world, being more open to meeting new people and willing to accept help from friends.
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