How to Kiss for the First Time

If you like someone and are pretty confident that he or she likes you, you’re probably wondering if it’s time for your first kiss. The first kiss is always emotional, but it’s also common to feel nervous and anxious about not knowing what to do. In fact, that person probably feels the same way as you do. When you’re ready for your first kiss, choose an appropriate moment, such as a certain moment on a date, followed by touching your partner and leaning in to kiss. When the kiss is over, hold the person’s hand or cuddle a little longer.

Table of Contents

Setting the scene

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Choose the right setting for your first kiss. No matter how eager you are, it’s best to choose a time and place that feels good. Wait until there is no one around but you and the person you want to kiss. Next, talk to the person to make sure they’re comfortable and happy. ^{[1] X Research Source}

For example, it’s not a good idea if you’re going to kiss someone who’s busy at work or when they’re upset.
A favorable setting for a first kiss could be a date or a school dance.

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Flirting a little to make the kiss emotional. Smile at the person, extending your arms at your sides so it doesn’t seem like you’re closed off. Lightly touch the person’s hand, arm, or thigh if they’re okay with it. Don’t forget to say a few compliments, ask questions, and listen to what the person has to say. ^{[2] X Research Source}

Observe the person’s gestures to see if they flirt with you back. If your partner looks you in the eye, smiles, stays open, and talks a lot, they’re flirting with you, too.
On the other hand, if you notice them moving away, crossing their arms over their chest, or looking down, take it slow and give them some space.

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Apply lip balm, but avoid sticky lip gloss. No one wants to kiss dry, chapped lips, so make sure you apply lip balm for soft and seductive lips. Choose a fragrance-free lipstick, as the person may not like the scent. ^{[3] X Research Sources}

Sticky lip gloss often makes people hesitate because it seems unnatural. Use your regular lip balm.
If you still wear lipstick on a normal day, you can still kiss with lipstick, but choose a lipstick that is long-lasting and doesn’t smudge. Also, don’t put on lipstick right before you kiss.

Leaning to give a kiss

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Lightly touch the person to initiate physical contact. First, touch the person’s arm or shoulder. Next, bring your hand to the person’s hair or face and gently touch for a few seconds. When you feel ready, gently tuck her hair back, place your hand on her shoulder, or place your hand on her cheek. ^{[5] X Research Sources}

You can also try putting your arm around the person’s shoulders.
Be slow to touch. Start with a small gesture like touching the person’s hand, and only continue if you see them smile and lean towards you.

Tip: It’s okay if you change your mind and don’t want to kiss anymore. Feeling stressed and changing your mind is normal. If this happens, you can deflect by asking the person something, such as “Can you teach me to play the game we talked about the other day?”, “I wonder what everyone is doing?” . Let’s go out and check it out”, or “I’m hungry! Let’s find something to eat.”

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Look him in the eye to show your love. Catch the person’s eyes and look them in the eye for 1-3 seconds, then look away for a few seconds. Keep glancing at them but don’t constantly stare. ^{[6] X Research Sources}

If the person makes eye contact with you, it’s more likely that they like you and will most likely accept the kiss.
If the person avoids your gaze, they probably don’t want to kiss.

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Ask them if they want to kiss. The best way to be sure you both want to kiss is to ask the other person. Although this is a bit scary, it is very romantic. Here are a few suggestions for you: ^{[7] X Research Sources}

“Can I kiss you?”
“Can I ask for a kiss?”
“Do you want me to kiss you?”

Advice: If you don’t dare to ask, that’s okay too! Many people are afraid to open their mouth to ask for a kiss. Consider writing them a note instead of saying it out loud, such as “Kiss me?” or “Can we kiss?”

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Move closer to that person. Close the gap between the two of you by inching closer or leaning towards the person. Then, wait for them to move closer to you, a sign that your partner wants to kiss you too. ^{[8] X Research Sources}

If the person pulls away, it doesn’t seem like they want to kiss. Your best bet is to stop and give them space.

End of the kiss

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Let go of each other so you can both breathe. Do not continue kissing for more than a few seconds. Let’s stop and separate for a bit. Take a few seconds to breathe and think about what just happened. ^{[13] X Research Source}

You can kiss again, but it’s best to take a break first.

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Smile at the person to show that you liked the last kiss. Don’t forget that people are just as nervous as you are. Let the person know that you enjoy the kiss by looking at them and smiling. ^{[14] X Research Source}

You can also hold the person’s hand or put your arm around the person.

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Only kiss again if the other person seems ready. Look into their eyes and lean in again. Wait to see if he leans in. If unsure, you can ask them if they want a second kiss. ^{[15] X Research Source}

Say “Do you want to kiss again?” or “Can I do it again?”
Only kiss a second time if you want to. You don’t have to if you don’t feel the urge.

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Stroking or holding hands a few minutes after kissing. After you kiss, you should cuddle the person a little. Hug, hold hands, or lean close to the person. Do whatever makes you both comfortable. ^{[16] X Research Source}

Relax and enjoy the moment together. You can watch a movie together, chat or go for a walk.

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Say something about kissing when you’re ready. Maybe you’re still overwhelmed or nervous after the kiss; that’s okay too. Maybe you’re really excited and having fun. Either way, tell your partner about the experience when you feel ready, right after the kiss or after some time of the day or night. ^{[17] X Research Source}

For example, you could say “I’ve been waiting to kiss you for a long time”, “What a great kiss”, or “I’m a good kisser”.
You don’t have to speak right after the kiss. It’s okay to wait a while.

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Contact the person again the next day. Text, call, or chat with the person to ask how they’re doing. Let your partner know you’re looking forward to your next date or more outing. And don’t forget to say how much you enjoyed that kiss. ^{[18] X Research Sources}

Remember that you don’t always have to give consent after your first kiss. You can wait a while before kissing again. On the other hand, if you’re eagerly waiting for the chance to have another kiss, that’s completely natural.
Say something like, “Last night was fun. The kiss was really sweet. Do you want to drive me home from school after school?”

Advice

Let’s relax. This will make your kiss even better.
It’s normal for the first kiss to be a little awkward. Just try to enjoy the moment.
The thrill of kissing someone for the first time is very common.
If you feel nervous, tell them how you feel. Perhaps the other person is just as worried as you are.

Warning

Don’t kiss someone who shows signs of being sick, such as coughing or sneezing. Also don’t kiss someone with sores around their mouth. Although sometimes it’s just a pimple, it’s possible they have cold sores, a contagious disease.

Steps

Setting the scene

Leaning to give a kiss

End of the kiss

Advice

Warning

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